HP fic: Beginning [Harry/Draco, adult]
Title: Beginning Author: celandineb Fandom: HP Pairing: Harry/Draco Rating: adult Warnings: pretty mild, actually; clothing stays on Summary: Now that he's left Ginny, Harry has invited Draco to see his new flat. Note: Sixth in the Settlement series: Settlement, Choices, Friends, Resolve, Visitor
That the flat above Ollivander's Wands had been used for storage for some years was not immediately evident; Harry had not only cleared out all of the boxes and bundles that had crammed the rooms, he had somehow managed to repaint the entire place in a week. The furniture, however, was an eclectic, not to say eccentric, hodgepodge that looked as if it had been mostly cadged from friends' cast-offs, perhaps including some remnants from Mister Ollivander's time, with the few exceptions being of cheap Muggle origin.
"It's lovely," Draco lied. Actually the flat did have possibilities, but whether it was worth Harry's while to improve the place much would depend on how long he intended to live there -- and of that Draco had no idea.
"It's all right." Harry shrugged, setting the bags of Chinese takeaway down on a rather rickety-looking table. "Not nearly as nice as yours, but it'll do for the moment. Do you want to see the rest?"
Draco nodded and stepped forward at Harry's gesture to follow him.
The kitchen was tiny. Harry had painted it yellow, presumably with an eye to cheerfulness, but it was still quite claustrophobia-inducing. Along the hallway the bath appeared to have been last renovated somewhere around the time that Dumbledore had defeated Grindelwald.
Seeing Draco's raised eyebrows, Harry said with embarrassed haste, "It's ancient, I know, but there's plenty of hot water, and the loo hasn't given me any trouble."
There was only the one bedroom. Harry had a double bed, Draco noticed. It was covered with a bright turquoise duvet which didn't look at all like Harry's taste; neither did the pillow slips, gaudy with stars in a rainbow of colors.
"I haven't had time to go out and buy much yet; this is what we had in the spare bedroom. Lily chose the linens and the duvet cover when she was about twelve." Harry smiled. "Thank goodness I think her taste has improved since then."
"They could have been far worse," Draco pointed out. "At the age of twelve, I would have expected her to go for some dreadful shade of pink."
Harry smiled and seemed to relax. "You're quite right. I hadn't thought of that. I suppose I've gotten off lucky, really."
They returned to the living room, where the cartons of food were giving off a most appetizing set of aromas. For a little while they said nothing except, "Pass the rice?" or, "The last eggroll is yours if you want it."
Harry put the leftover food into the fridge when they had finished, and called out to Draco, who had remained in the living room, "Anything to drink? I don't have much, but there's some lager, or I can open a bottle of wine."
"Whatever you want, Harry," said Draco, rising and walking over to the small bookshelf next to the pair of mismatched chairs. He bent down and was reading the titles when Harry came back.
"It's a warm night, I thought lager..." Harry broke off. "Oh."
Draco had pulled one of the volumes from the shelf and was leafing through it. "This one looks new. I'm a little surprised to see it stuck in there when all of the other books are on wand lore."
The blood had rushed up in Harry's cheeks, but he stood his ground, holding out Draco's glass, and said with only a slight quiver in his voice, "It's not a topic that I'd had any real need to know about, before. I bought that in a Muggle bookshop a few weeks ago and kept it in the back room at the shop while I was thinking about... everything."
"Not with another man, no." Harry's voice was quiet. "Not really. A mutual hand job or two, back at school, but it wasn't something that interested me all that much; it was less fuss to wank and think of Ginny, you know? There was no one, then, who made me feel like you do now."
Still holding the book, Draco reached out with his other hand and took his glass, taking a deep gulp without letting his eyes turn away from Harry's. "Shall we sit down?"
Harry sat across from Draco and raised his glass to his lips. Draco watched him swallow once, twice, then lower the drink and look back with a wide green gaze.
"So I take it that you've been reading through this, then." Draco turned a couple of pages. "Was it helpful?"
"I suppose." Harry paused. "There were certainly things that I would never have thought of, illustrated there. Things I'm not sure I'd necessarily want to try." There was a curious expression on his face as he faced Draco. "Do... do many queer wizards do these sorts of things, or are Muggles different? I mean, I know that in general wizards and Muggles are pretty much alike, but social customs vary rather a lot, and I don't know if this might be one of them."
"I... probably haven't had as much experience as you might think," Draco told him. "Even though Daphne always knew what I am, and accepted it, that doesn't mean I was out shagging every fanciable wizard I might see. And certainly not Muggles." He had done that once or twice, actually, but he hadn't been comfortable with it.
"So I don't know; there are probably things I've never done or heard of in there, too, but I'm pretty familiar with the basics." Draco set the book down. "Look, if you're asking in a roundabout way if I'll sleep with you, you must know the answer is yes. And I'll do my best to show you whatever you want to know about having sex with another wizard, but there's certainly nothing in particular that one has to do. Besides." Draco allowed himself to lean forward and touch Harry's knee, "you only just left your wife. I don't want you to do anything you're not ready to do, just because you think I might want it. Ever since you first contacted me about settling our life debt, and we kissed, I've wanted you, yes: Merlin, I've had passing fantasies about you since I can remember, for that matter. But I want you to be sure that this is what you want."
Having spent the better part of his life in a marriage that, while friendly, was nothing more than that, with occasional furtive and sometimes anonymous encounters to relieve his sexual desires, Draco was prepared to wait for as much longer as might be necessary. If -- beyond the whole question of the unresolved emotions affecting their mutual life debt -- Harry was just realizing for the first time that he might fancy men in general, as well as women, and Draco happened to be convenient... well, that wasn't enough. Perhaps it would have been once, but now Draco would rather simply remain friends.
"I understand." Harry's expression was solemn. "I'm not going to want to rush things, either, but maybe we could start with a kiss and see what happens?"
"Too bad you don't have a sofa. It's going to be either awkward sitting in these chairs or -- I have to admit it -- I'm going to be a little stiff if we go down on the floor." Draco allowed himself a hint of a grin so that Harry would know his objections were not too serious.
Harry returned the smile. "There's always the bed," he pointed out. "If that's not rushing things too much."
"It's your choice. If you're comfortable with that, then so am I." When they stood up, however, Draco put his arms around Harry and kissed him first right there. The same shiver went through him as he had felt the previous time they had kissed, nearly two years ago.
Kissing Harry was like coming home in a way that Draco couldn't remember ever having felt in his life, and it was better even than the other time, because now he knew Harry. The tie between them wasn't just the residual magic of a mutual life debt, nor the sort of inexplicable physical attraction that one might feel even for a stranger, but rather it reflected a connection that he knew was deeply emotional -- at least for himself, and he hoped for Harry too. However it had begun, two years of friendship had made this an entanglement that Draco could no longer imagine wanting to unknot.
With a sigh Harry relaxed into Draco's embrace, his hands on Draco's back and pulling him close. The way he moved his lips and tongue was gentle, almost tentative; Draco supposed that was because Harry was used to kissing Ginny, whom he imagined might prefer restraint. In response, Draco increased the force of his own kiss, wordlessly encouraging Harry to reciprocate. Harry's mouth tasted of lager and Chinese spices and behind that the sweetness that was Harry himself, letting Draco take the lead but following him willingly.
Still wrapped in the pleasure of the ongoing kiss, Draco brought one hand up, sliding his fingers into Harry's hair, feeling the coarser texture of the white strands scattered through the darker locks. He took hold of the earpiece of Harry's glasses and lifted them, tugging a little awkwardly as they caught on Harry's other ear but finally able to pull them away and drop them with a clatter on the table.
One of Harry's hands crept up to cup Draco's cheek as Harry drew away long enough to say, "God... this is... why did I wait so long to realize?" His mouth found Draco's again, sucking hungrily at his tongue as if drawing sustenance from it.
By unspoken accord they moved slowly together across the living room, still kissing, nearly bumping into the wall of the hallway as they headed for Harry's bedroom, Harry's bed. Draco ran his hands up and down Harry's back as they stretched out, and kicked his shoes off, letting them fall to the floor. He heard the thump as Harry did likewise.
He pushed Harry over onto his back, and then raised himself up to look into Harry's eyes, dilated with desire. "What do you want?"
Harry's throat moved as he swallowed. "I just want to be with you like this for now, if that's all right?"
Draco nodded, saying, "We needn't undress, but could I touch you through your clothes?" He rested a hand on Harry's hip, his thumb sweeping inward so that Harry would know what he meant.
"Okay," said Harry in the barest whisper. Draco moved his fingers and found the soft bulge of Harry's cock under the loose fabric of his trousers. It was already growing, stiffening, even as he brushed over it, and Harry gave a little moan that made Draco glad of his age, because if he'd been twenty-five years younger he would have come untouched in his own trousers at the sound of that pure need. He ignored his own desire, however, focusing all his attention on Harry, determined to bring Harry the most pleasure he could.
He left his hand resting on Harry's cock, scarcely moving, and leaned to kiss Harry yet again, this time exploring the whole of his face, from earlobe to chin, from forehead to neck. He felt the rasp of stubble under his lips as he brushed them along the line of Harry's jaw and then swept up to plant tender kisses on each eyelid before finally returning to sample the sweetness of his mouth once more. Harry reciprocated, exploring Draco's mouth and then shifting to nibble at the skin of his neck, sucking at the hollow of Draco's throat. His hips rocked against Draco's hand.
"Is that good, Harry? Do you like that?" Draco murmured, pressing a little harder.
"Yes." Harry opened his eyes. "God, yes." Draco nodded and continued to pet over Harry's prick, gradually increasing the firmness of his strokes. He watched the flush rise in Harry's cheeks.
"Let yourself feel," he said softly, and Harry shuddered, his body going limp in the aftermath of orgasm. Draco felt the dampness seeping through Harry's trousers. He twisted his hips, reaching for his own cock, and a few strokes brought him over the edge as well.
Harry was watching, a slightly disappointed look on his face. "I would have done that if you'd asked," he said.
"There will be plenty of time. I didn't want to push you yet." Draco put his arm over Harry's waist. "But I'm sorry that I didn't ask, if you wanted to. I'm not used to being with someone else any more."
Harry nodded. "It's all right. I understand. I hope, though, that you'll want to stay, for little while at least?"
"Very much. I could stay all night if you like; I'd just have to go home early in the morning, to shower and change and so forth before I have to go to work."
"I'd like it if you stayed," whispered Harry, holding Draco tight. "I'd like that a great deal."