HP fic: Affinity, part 2 [Remus/Severus, adult]
Title: Affinity, part 2 Authors: celandineb and cruisedirector Fandom: HP Pairing: Remus/Severus Rating: adult Warnings: watersports, wanking Summary: Lupin is finding the Defense Against the Dark Arts conference holds unexpected surprises. Also here. Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling invented Snape and Lupin. We have only ourselves to blame for their behavior here.
Lupin often woke repeatedly in the night, a holdover from the days when he had been staying with Fenrir's pack and it had not been safe to sleep too deeply. When he stirred the first time, hearing breathy snoring next to him, reaching out to touch warm skin, it took him a minute to remember why. Severus. He smiled to himself and went back to sleep.
The second time it was not his own nightmares that awakened him, but Snape's restless tossing and murmuring. He laid a hand on the other man's shoulder and Snape calmed, curling closer and beginning to snore again.
Pale early morning light was creeping through the curtains the third time Lupin woke, far too early for his preference. Snape was gone. The stab of hurt that Lupin felt surprised him; there was no reason why Snape should have stayed, really, in fact it was better that they be discreet. Nonetheless, when the door clicked open and Snape slipped back inside, he was more than pleased.
Snape was carrying shoes and some other items of clothing that he draped over the rickety chair. He shrugged out of the robe he had put on, then moved across the room while Lupin rolled onto his back to look up at him.
"You're awake." Snape made the declaration with a certain amount of regret, as if he had been hoping to sneak back into the narrow bed without being caught. Instead he sat on an edge somewhat stiffly until Lupin leaned over to stroke his arm.
"So are you." A faint headache was threatening behind Lupin's eyes, but he managed a smile. Snape held out his hand, revealing a small bottle. "What's this?"
"The remedy for cocktail receptions. It will clear your head, settle your stomach, freshen your breath, and remove the red from your eyes."
Taking the bottle with a broader smile, Lupin asked, "If it's so efficacious, Severus, why haven't you left teaching and gone into business selling it? Doubtless you could make a fortune."
"Some of the ingredients are not precisely Ministry-approved." With a laugh, Lupin removed the stopper and sniffed. The potion smelled sweet, with traces of mint and maybe licorice. He swallowed it in a single gulp and immediately felt the headache recede. "Potions conferences are far more educational than those on the Dark Arts, you know."
"Are they? I would say that this one has proved quite educational, so far. If perhaps not in the way that the organizers intended." He gave the bottle back to Snape and propped himself on his elbow. "That potion is marvelous."
"Thank you." Snape still looked wary and a little uncomfortable.
"It can't be later than six, can it?" Lupin yawned. "Don't tell me you have to be up and going this early. I'm sure that breakfast won't even be available for a couple of hours... won't you come back to bed?"
Snape nodded, a single jerk of his chin, and slid under the sheet. His skin was cool when Lupin touched it. "I think you made me an offer last night."
"Did I?" Lupin shivered involuntarily, deliciously, but Snape's eyes narrowed as if he thought that he was being mocked.
"You know you did." Throwing a leg over Lupin, Snape swung himself on top and rested on elbows and knees above him.
"I do know," Lupin agreed in a thick, constrained voice. Now that he knew what was coming, he was quivering in anticipation. "Please."
Oh, so Snape was going to make him say it. "Piss on me. All over me. Please."
Taking his prick in his hand, Snape looked down at Lupin before releasing a golden arc onto his belly. He moved the stream up Lupin's chest, wetting the hair, the strong scent of it wafting to Lupin's nose. Lupin moved his hand to touch the wetness and heard himself whine as Snape sprayed his skin, now turning the flow of piss back towards Lupin's groin, where his cock was hardening rapidly.
He could see himself reflected in Snape's dark eyes and suddenly wondered if Snape could read his thoughts -- Dumbledore had once mentioned that Snape was skilled at both Legilimency and Occlumency, useful abilities when he was spying for the Order against Voldemort. He wasn't sure he wanted Snape to know what he was thinking, and strengthened his own mental barriers just in case.
"Will you really follow me all day?" Snape's voice was harsh, rasping. He must have been almost finished; Lupin could feel that the flow was slowing to a trickle, splattering his thighs, and regretted it.
"I'd probably have followed you all day anyway," he admitted and watched Snape's eyes widen as he dribbled himself empty. A yellow drop was hanging from the head of the twitching cock, and Lupin strained upward to lick it off, feeling the warm shaft stiffen against his lips. Sliding his hands around Snape's hips, he shifted into a sitting position, wriggling awkwardly to let his own erection pop up between his legs. "Right now I want something else for breakfast."
He pushed back the foreskin, took the cock into his mouth and sucked it, bringing it to full hardness while he rubbed the moisture covering him over his own prick and balls. Snape let out a long breath, then inhaled and moaned. "I won't last long if you do that."
It was what Lupin had expected -- he never lasted long in the morning himself, and given how uncomfortable his arse was from the hard fucking Snape had given him the night before, he imagined that Snape was feeling rather sore as well. "Come in my mouth. Want to taste it," he muttered before taking the silky head between his lips again. He licked under the foreskin, tasting the muskiness there, and ran his tongue over the slit which was now leaking something quite different from the piss that had flooded out of it only moments ago. With his free hand he steadied the base and began to play with Snape's balls, tugging gently at the loose skin as Snape gasped and steadied himself with his hands on Lupin's shoulders.
"Remus," he muttered, his hips thrusting, not too deeply, so that Lupin was able to keep his teeth out of the way and let his throat relax as much as he could. He'd worked hard to overcome his gag reflex and was rather pleased that he could take in nearly all of Snape's cock. He moaned around the hard shaft, letting go of his own to stroke the skin of Snape's bum.
Snape moaned too, arching closer, sliding one hand across Lupin's back to rest in his hair. Indeed, he did not last long; a couple of minutes of sliding in and out of Lupin's throat, with Lupin's fingers rubbing over the bollocks and teasing behind them, were enough to make him go rigid and fill Lupin's mouth with thick bitter cream. "Remus -- fuck, Remus," he choked out the instant before, so that Lupin knew to expect it, and he drew back to swallow, keeping his lips sealed around the swollen cock-head.
When he glanced up he expected to see Snape with his head thrown back or his eyes clenched shut, but Snape was peering down at him, mouth hanging open as he panted, fingers moving in Lupin's hair. Pulling his mouth free with a last lick, Lupin smiled at him. "All right?"
"That would be putting it mildly," Snape replied as he sank down from his knees, reaching to replace Lupin's fingers on his own cock. Their gazes locked and again Lupin had the impression that Snape was seeing more than the color of his eyes.
Pushing back, he found that Snape was not blocking him, and then he found himself sharing a rather detailed fantasy of himself sitting over Snape and wanking onto his face. He raised his eyebrows, and Snape nodded firmly. "If you don't mind?"
"Not at all." Lupin had never considered sharing a sexual fantasy this way; there was something graceful about it, he decided, that he rather liked. Snape sat back and then lay down, his gaze following Lupin as he moved to kneel over him, resting on his heels so that he was poised over Snape's chest.
"Yes," Snape breathed, watching intently as Lupin began to stroke himself. He had already been close to coming, so he tried to be slow, to put on a bit of a show for Snape, beginning by running his fingers lightly down the shaft, tracing the vein underneath. His blood was pounding so hard he thought that Snape must be able to hear it. Then he toyed with his foreskin, dragging it up and down over the head of his cock, spreading the wetness that was beginning to leak from it. One finger grazed over the damp head so that Lupin could raise it to his mouth and taste the fluid; then he touched it again so he could offer Snape the fingertip to suck.
The tug of Snape's mouth on his finger made Lupin's cock throb, which reminded him that he had not emptied his bladder yet this morning and he'd drunk more than Snape the night before. Maybe, he thought, Snape would let him come on him and then wash the semen away with a golden shower... he heard Snape groan and understood abruptly that Snape had seen those images form in his mind. Pushing back again, he saw Snape's willingness, his desire to be held down and marked, then followed just as Lupin had threatened to follow him, not only master but prey...
Lupin scarcely had time to grunt a warning before he spurted onto Snape's cheek, only just missing his eye. The Legilimency between them was severed when Snape let his lashes fall shut, but the two of them were arching and crying out together, and Lupin did not think he had ever felt so close to anyone during sex. When the spasms had stopped and he could see Snape clearly again, he saw that he was lying with his eyes still shut and the corners of his mouth turned up very slightly, as if in hopeful expectation.
Still half-hard, Lupin needed a minute before he could coax his bladder to release its burden and the flow made his cock tingle as it passed out the tip. He groaned again, spilling piss over Snape's cheek, soaking it and the dark hair spread on the mattress.
Snape grunted as the hot liquid touched him, bringing up his hand to clench Lupin's knee and quivering. Lupin aimed carefully, making certain that the piss rinsed away each drop of white that he had left on Snape's cheek and ear, sluicing it down onto the mattress. "Ah..." Snape licked his lips when Lupin had finished, tasting where a few droplets had clung. He opened his eyes at last and shared the satisfaction, the pleasure he had felt, through that wordless gaze.
"This is what sex should be like." Lupin didn't realize he had said the words aloud, rather than just thinking them, until Snape threw up his mental barriers. Did he not agree, or was he too proud to say that a kinky encounter with a werewolf was what he enjoyed? Or perhaps... perhaps he was afraid of it? That much Lupin could understand. He was, too, if he stopped to consider. Suddenly uneasy, with the beginnings of shame heating his features, he slid from Snape's body and reached for his wand, wanting to remove the evidence.
"Wait." Lupin glanced back at the low command, watching Snape lift himself up on his elbows. "I did not mean to... to offend."
"You didn't offend, Severus." He had found the wand, and returned slowly back to the bed with it, smiling a little. "Maybe it was too much, too soon."
"Perhaps." Snape met his eyes, but the barrier was still there and Lupin regretted it. He had not been offended, that was true, but he was sorry that there was again a distance between them when he had briefly felt so close.
"Scourgify." In an instant all the fluids were gone, the sheets dry and clean, no trace even of the smell left. Lupin perched on the edge of the mattress. A stray thought struck him, and he chuckled.
"What is so funny?" asked Snape, his tone edged with wariness.
"I was just thinking that being a wizard is awfully convenient for indulging this sort of predilection. Muggles must have to restrict themselves to bathtubs, or use rubberized sheets or something," Lupin explained.
"I believe there are Muggle clubs dedicated specifically to this activity. Plastic furniture, plastic floors... everything can be washed down in the wee hours."
Laughing softly again, this time at the turn of phrase, Lupin wondered how Snape had made this discovery. "I wouldn't want to be the cleaning staff. Have you been inside one of these clubs?"
"Once. I admit I was curious. I did not stay. What I witnessed was vulgar, impersonal, and rather repulsive."
"I've never wanted to do this with a stranger, either. But then, I've also never had any interest in picking up men in pubs." Snape glanced at him curiously, and Lupin thought he was not shutting him out quite so much. "There has to be some... I don't know. I suppose you were right and we've never been the sort to get drunk together. But I wanted to, with you."
"Get drunk with me, or play pissing games?"
"Why me?" Snape sounded startled.
"Good question," Lupin admitted, shifting to lie next to Snape, propping himself up on one arm. "Perhaps because you always seemed so controlled... even when we were both still in school, and certainly since. Those robes-of-a-hundred-buttons you choose to wear: so restrained, such a barrier. I wasn't even sure if you were queer. It was a kind of ultimate fantasy, to think about how someone like you might act if you were willing to get really dirty. I never thought you would actually have any interest, though, until I saw you watching me in the bathroom last night. I've been in gay bars, and men check out each other all the time there... but you weren't just looking at my cock, it was the fact that I was pissing, too."
Snape appeared to be rather mortified, not at having been caught watching Lupin piss, but at having made his wishes so transparent. He had been relaxed in the tub, and bored, and Lupin had not missed the references to werewolves and marking; perhaps Snape had never given him a thought before the situation presented itself. But Snape said, "You thought about me that way when we were in school?"
"I assumed that you despised me as much as your friends did."
"I never despised you. And I make no excuses for what did... I never have. But I was not involved in their pranks, though I should have done more to try to stop them." Lupin paused, looking at Snape's downturned expression. "I have never understood why you were so curious about me. Where I went each month."
"At first I didn't think about it when you disappeared. But after a year or two I started to notice, and wonder. You often seemed ill, not before you left, but when you came back -- tired, pale, sometimes bandaged. It didn't add up." Snape shrugged.
"But why would you care about me? It's not as if there wasn't a good deal to keep your mind occupied. And I was friends with James and Sirius..."
"That's right, you were. I suppose it was a challenge. If I could find out something secret out about you, maybe I could take you away from them." Snape's face was red. "Pettigrew wasn't worth the effort. You seemed like you might be."
"A friend," Snape said shortly, still looking away. "Even though you ran with that little group of Gryffindors, you always seemed different. Set apart. I thought perhaps we might have that in common." Snape glanced back at him. "I never imagined that your secret was so drastic."
"And once you knew it, you didn't want to be my friend anymore." Now it was Lupin's turn to look away.
"Don't flatter yourself that it was your lycanthropy that made me realize we could never be friends." Snape's voice had gone cold and hard. "Your 'friend' Sirius Black nearly allowed you to attack me. What do you think would have happened if his little plan had succeeded? Yet you insisted that it was only a prank."
"I can only apologize so many times." Lupin met Snape's glare in full, surprised that although his face was taut with remembered anger, his barriers were lower than they had been. "There are many things I would choose differently if I had my life to live again. We can't undo those. We can only decide not to make the same mistakes again."
"Are you lecturing me?"
"I'm -- I suppose I'm asking." Lupin took a deep breath. "We're colleagues. I've wanted us to be friends. I'd like us to be more than friends. This is the best sex I've had in... maybe forever. Is what you want here entirely physical? Because I want to be your lover." He kept his eyes on Snape's, deliberately leaving his mind open to let the truth be read.
"Why?" Snape's voice was harsh, but he did not look away. "Sex with you was... good, yes. And I am quite happy to continue it, if you wish. Isn't that enough?"
"Strange though it may seem, Severus, I like you. We do have a great deal in common, one way and another," said Lupin patiently, pushing his hair out of his eyes. "I'm not asking for a lifetime commitment, which would be ridiculous. Just... something more than a quick shag now and again."
He saw Snape swallow. "I -- let me consider. This has all been entirely unexpected."
"Fair enough," Lupin nodded, and gave an ingenuous smile. "Do you mind if I follow you around all day, though?"