|Hiroki (shakkun) wrote in candypop,|
@ 2009-02-11 14:14:00
4th of February 2009, Ryo, Hiroki and random people
"You're not coming home tonight, are you?" Hiroki asked, fighting not to sound like a clingy boyfriend. He knew he was, but was it really that difficult to understand why? If Ryo would answer no to this question, then it would be the third night in a row that he stayed out. Was it really that difficult to understand why Hiroki wanted his boyfriend to get home? It wasn't as if they had all the time in the world - he was busy too, he had friends he hung out with as well and because of both of them being busy lately, Ryo's parents had offered to take care of Miyuki for a while but even so the two of them had barely seen each other in two weeks now.
Maybe it was only Hiroki who noticed? Maybe it was only he who actually wanted to see Ryo while Ryo maybe felt he needed a break? Breaks were necessary after all...
The matter still angered him though, and thus Hiroki had no problems with suppressing the tears this time and instead he walked over to window while he waited for Ryo to say something. Probably he would answer something along the lines no, sorry'. Lately he was apologizing just a little bit too much, way too often.
Checking the time from his phone, Ryo emptied what was left in his glass before leaving it into the sink; he’d do the dishes later.
“Don’t think so...,” the older one mumbled as he walked through the living room, picking up his wallet from the coffee table, along with his keys and some other stuff. It probably wasn’t wise to go out as he was already feeling a bit tired, but he didn’t see anything good in staying at home either, he’d just end up going to bed early, or playing videogames all night, or something like that as Hiroki would most likely go out like he had quite often these passing days – honestly Ryo had no idea how they had ended up like this, but it seemed that now that they had the chance to, both of them had ended up going out a lot, not together though as there weren’t many friends they shared and in the end it probably was better like this too as everyone knew how Ryo got when he had some alcohol in his blood and Hiroki next to him… besides it was fun to just hang out with his friends too, it had been a good while since he had gotten to really do that!
“Guys wanna check out some new place and if it’s good we’ll probably run late…”
Hiroki was going out as well, of course he was, but had Ryo asked him to he would have no problems with getting home a bit early so they could just -be-, just the two of them. But as he received a reply like that, of course even thinking of suggesting it was considered stupid. The guy wanted to hang out with his friends, of course he did.
"Okay," the taller of the two answered shortly before he left the living room and instead headed for the kitchen. He'd start getting ready soon but before that he had to kill the headache he could sense coming.
Maybe he could spend the night at Mizuki's because as it was right now, he seriously didn't feel like getting back home to an empty apartment tonight. If nothing else he could get on the train and just sit there for ages though of course.
Not noticing anything different in the way Hiroki was acting, Ryo checked himself from the mirror quickly before going to get his jacket.
“You got tomorrow off too?” he then shouted from the hallway, taking his jacket from a hanger before quickly walking back into the kitchen to see Hiroki off. If the younger one would be free the next day though, then maybe they could just spend time with each other for a change, of course that was only in case Hiroki wouldn’t be busy meeting up with his friends…
“No,” the younger one immediately answered and once having put down the glass on the counter, he turned to look at his boyfriend. Maybe it was stupid, maybe he was being really silly but for some reason he really didn’t want to be the one to nag about it. If Ryo didn’t want to be home, then Hiroki of course wouldn’t force him to be. It would be quite warming to hear that maybe Ryo missed him or something though…
“Magazine stuff,” he further explained, thinking that he definitely had to crash at someone’s place tonight – he would need to sleep some before work in the morning.
“Eh!?” Ryo exclaimed then, rather disappointed to hear the news, though he should’ve expected something like this, free time never lasted long enough after all.
“Damn…,” he mumbled then, pulling his jacket properly on and checking his pockets to make sure he had everything with him. As everything seemed to be in its place though, the older one decided he should hurry as it was never fun to be the last one to arrive.
“Oh well, can’t really do anything about it, have fun though!” Ryo said, reaching up to kiss his husband quickly before walking back to the hallway so that he could get his shoes on and then leave. “I’m going now!”
“Have fun…,” Hiroki mumbled as the door opened and then shortly after closed again. It couldn’t be helped, of course he knew that more than anyone, but did Ryo really have to sound so cheerful about it? Maybe he really was happy though… getting to be hung over alone, maybe it was a really nice thing to be.
Cursing lowly, Hiroki kicked the wall before heading to the bathroom. A quick shower would be needed before he could get out and if he kept his face wet it wouldn’t get swollen or anything if he would end up crying. Why were they acting like this? Sure, it hadn’t lasted for very long, but it felt like an eternity already. The two of them usually took time whenever they could to be with each other, but lately…
“Hiroki…?” Mizuki said as he poked his friend, trying to get his attention as it was really getting late, and not only that but Hiroki seemed to be quite drunk (considering the amount of the empty drinks on the table, he probably was) and if he had got it right, the younger one (just by a few months, but it still counted!!) had work in the morning, also it seemed like he would spend the night over, and to be honest Mizuki wasn’t quite sure if he wanted a drunken Hiroki around – he cared for his friend of course! But he also had promised that his girlfriend could come over tonight, and being a nice girl, she probably wouldn’t appreciate if he would bring drunken friends with him…
“Oi, Hiroki?!” he tried again, but with no luck as Hiroki was currently having quite a lively discussion with the girl that they had met just a while ago, she seemed like fun though, but really, they should just leave already, it was for Hiroki’s best! “Oi, Hiro! Let’s just leave? I’ll drive you home…?”
Finally reacting to that someone was calling for him, Hiroki quickly turned his attention to his friend. His very, very good friend by the way – Mizuki was probably the best friend a man could have! And woman too for that matter.
“Home? No, no, no, no,” the idol said, smiling way too widely for knowing what waited at home – no one – and then turned his attention back to Hana who was definitely really, really nice. And very cute, too!
“I don’t, not yet time to go, right?” he asked, of course he ended up mumbling half of it. Though by now it seemed that no one had a problem hearing what he said anymore so it was all perfectly okay. Leaning back against the back of the couch, he then reached out his hand to put some of Hana’s hair behind her ear. She had really pretty hear, all brown and just a little bit wavy. She was really, really pretty.
Letting out a soft giggle as she leaned back, surprised at the sudden touch, Hana felt how he cheeks burned just slightly – she couldn’t really help it, Hiroki was really pretty after all, pretty and tall!
Staring at the two, Mizuki soon grabbed Hiroki’s arm, pulling at it some.
“Really now Hiroki…,” he tried, really getting tired of this already, having first listened as Hiroki had ranted about what kind of an asshole his husband was – he couldn’t understand why Hiroki would stick with that guy if he really was that bad, really he couldn’t see why he would stick with any guy, but then again Hiroki was a bit like that wasn’t he? Mizuki didn’t really care – and then they had, or Hiroki had, gotten drunk, and that part had actually been fun up until now… why was it always so much trouble to get people home when they got drunk?
“It’s late and you have work tomorrow…..”
“I’ll be fiiiine Mizukiiii,” Hiroki answered then, smiling at his friend and then pulled his arm to himself so he would be able to pat Mizuki’s head. He was really cute who cared so much but it was still so early, no need to leave just yet.
“Soon, soon sounds good, soon,” he continued before turning to Hana again and then leaned closer so he could talk in a lower voice so only she would hear.
“Guy’s jealous,” he whispered and then placed a light kiss on her cheek. A voice in his head told him that he should just get up and get home now, but in his intoxicated state, it was really easy to ignore. After all, Ryo wasn’t there and Ryo wasn’t at home either – he hadn’t been for ages so what did it matter? Obviously it didn’t! Exactly, it didn’t really matter.
At Hiroki’s words, Hana took a glance at the other man, laughing at him softly before looking down at their feet so that her fringe would cover her eyes – it was a bit embarrassing after all, to just suddenly get kissed like that!!
Fingering the hem of her dress, she shook her head at Hiroki and let a soft smile spread on her lips, the night hadn’t turned out bad at all, even though her friends had ditched her so suddenly.
Making a face as he had caught some of what Hiroki had said to the girl, Mizuki shook his head as he took a look at his phone.
“Really though Hiroki!! I promised Keiko she could come over tonight…,” the older one of the two friends whined, really wanting to just go home already, and seeing the way Hiroki acted, Mizuki agreed with the thought that both of them should leave before something bad would happen, and Hiroki wasn’t quite acting his normal self right now either – maybe it made him a bad friend, as he didn’t do anything to stop him, but in Mizuki’s opinion it wasn’t his job to keep an eye on who Hiroki kissed and so on.
“I’ll be right back…,” he mumbled then, excusing himself from the table as he decided that he should at least give Keiko a call and tell her who to blame if they wouldn’t be able to meet tonight...
Barely noticing that Mizuki left, Hiroki smirked at Hana before reaching out for the half-empty beer bottle that was standing on the table. It didn’t take too long before the bottle now was empty and he gave the girl next to him all his attention again.
“Where d’you live?” he asked then, of course not thinking too far into it but not seeing it as impossible that maybe they could go there when the club was closing? Leaning closer to her though, Hiroki didn’t give her much time to answer before surprising her again by placing a kiss at the corner of her mouth.
Eyes widening for a second as she suddenly felt Hiroki’s lips on her skin, so close to her lips, Hana stayed silent for a few moments until quickly reaching for her drink, nervously taking a sip from it before turning her shy eyes at Hiroki again.
“A-actually,” she started, blushing at how her voice seemed to be a bit unsteady for a moment, swallowing with an awkward smile on her face, Hana brushed some of her hair behind her ear. “Actually, I’m not from here, I’m staying with a friend…”
Pulling back just a little bit, surprised to hear that, Hiroki frowned as he reached out his hand and inspected her earrings while trying to figure out what to say. If she wasn’t from here, didn’t that make everything even better?
“Where are you from then?” he eventually asked once he didn’t find her earring interesting enough anymore and then put his hand on her waist instead.
”Mm,” the girl hummed in agreement and nodded a little bit.
“You could tell….?” she then asked, looking at Hiroki curiously as she tilted her head to the side just slightly. Putting on a cute face as she bat her eyelashes at the young man, Hana reached for her drink again, sipping some of the sweet mix of alcohol and fruits.
“I’ve only been here for a week now,” she explained, nodding a bit before looking down at her manicured nails, which by the way were really adorable and light pink, only for a few more days though, then she would get them fixed again.
“It’s my first time in this club, but my friends… disappeared…,” Hana then said, looking around for her girl pals, but then turning her gaze back to Hiroki, looking just a little bit lost.
“You learn,” Hiroki answered as he then let his hand slowly run down over her hip. “Been touring a couple of times y’know, you learn.”
Normally Hiroki wouldn’t use his status as an idol to impress on people – and normally he wouldn’t even try to get this close to someone either – but right now nothing was as it normally was. Everything was weird and new and different, all thanks to Ryo but Hiroki didn’t really mind. It was nice doing some different though, and get it confirmed that he was still popular and that girls found him attractive, that was definitely something he didn’t dislike to know.
“I’ll take care of you, you’ll be fine…”
Laughing at a joke one of his friends made, Ryo took a sip from his bottle of beer, before placing it back on the table as his phone suddenly vibrated in his pocket.
“Eh…?” he mumbled, surprised as he noticed from whom the freshly received mail was – Asuka? Whatever could she have to tell him? And on this time of the night too... Clicking the mail open, and as there was no text written, a short video clip started playing, a clip with a couple sitting closely – it was quite blurry though and at first Ryo couldn’t make out who it was that sat there, his first guess was naturally that it was Asuka, but why would she send something like this to him?
“What the fuck…?” Ryo mumbled though, as the pair started to get more comfortable with each other; eventually starting to make out, seemingly unaware that they were being filmed.
“Eeh…,” he could hear someone whisper from behind him as some of the guys had gathered around him, curious to see what had gotten him so distracted. “Isn’t that Hiroki?” Tomohisa eventually mumbled from next to his friend, realizing just a second too late that maybe it would’ve been best to keep his mouth shut.
Staring at his phone, too shocked to say anything, Ryo let a couple of moments pass – the clip still rolling on the screen of his cell phone, displaying a video most likely taped just a moment ago, of his man, of his husband, making out with some random chick he couldn’t recognize.
It was probably for the best that Ryo had just a moment ago placed his bottle on the table, as once he finally snapped out of it, he wasn’t quite sure of what to do and how to react. Snapping his phone close, Ryo stood up from the couch he had been sitting on, hastily stuffing the device back into the pocket of his jeans, looking around as if he didn’t know which rote to take – not that Tomohisa’s apartment had more than one that led outside, but that was probably the last thing Ryo’s mind right now – all he knew was that he had to get out, had to get home, because that was where Hiroki would be wasn’t it? Hiroki would be there like always…
“I…,” he mumbled, looking at his just equally confused friends before cursing out loud and walking towards the hallway, quickly grabbing his jacket and without a word, heading out as fast as he could.
Completely unaware of what had happened last night, it was a tired and hungry Hiroki that arrived back home a little past five in the afternoon the following day. Eventually Mizuki had managed to drag Hiroki away from the girl he didn’t even remember the name of now, and being the good friend he was Mizuki had let Hiroki spend the night.
Work had been like normal, not too difficult or too easy. It had taken quite some hours though and thanks to the wonderful hung over, those hours had felt like fifty eternities all together. Of course he knew he had no one to blame but himself, but if he was allowed to be a bit childish, he actually would like to blame Ryo.
Despite not expecting anyone to be home, Hiroki mumbled a small ‘I’m back’ as he walked through the door and easily got out of his shoes. It was freezing outside and despite having his jacket on and so many layers clothes, he still really felt as if he was going to freeze to death sometime soon. He needed coffee and he needed it really quickly.
Standing by the kitchen counter, Ryo calmly sipped from his cup of coffee before putting it down, pouring some for Hiroki as well – the younger one would probably need it. Under the calm surface though, Ryo was no where near as collected and cool as he seemed, still in disbelief after last night, with various different emotions stirring inside him, confusion and frustration turning into anger and despair – feeling betrayed and humiliated in front of his friends.
Looking down at his hand, watching how it shook just slightly under the pressure, giving away his unstable state for those who would’ve known where to look at, Ryo handed Hiroki his cup as the younger one entered the kitchen.
“Had fun?” he asked, the tone of his voice down as he kept his calm appearance up for now.
“Thank you,” Hiroki mumbled, flashing the older one a small smile as he received the cup. It was really nice of him after all, to randomly be at home and even be so nice to hand him coffee. Smiling a little bit more at the thought, the younger one soon sat down by the table, not really noticing that something was off with Ryo at all. Except for that he was home of course, that was a bit weird and not really what he had expected.
“Work was work,” he continued but then as he realized that Ryo was probably referring to last night as they rarely asked each other much about work, Hiroki drank some from the hot coffee.
“Last night was fun,” his answer went as he glanced at the counter, hoping to see maybe a cup or something which would tell him if Ryo had been home all day. Though as everything was perfectly clean there was no way he could tell.
Smiling in a way he usually wouldn’t, not when with Hiroki at least, Ryo emptied his cup into the sink.
“Ended up at Tomo’s place,” Ryo said, seeing no reason explain any further, the new club had sucked though, being way too packed up with people for their taste and so Tomohisa had generously invited everyone over – that wasn’t important though, what he had been up to was right now very much the last thing on his mind, if you didn’t count the part he would very much like to forget. “Where did you go?”
Looking up then, surprised by Ryo’s sudden decision not to have any coffee, Hiroki frowned. He had been going out with his friends quite a lot and not even once had Ryo bothered to ask where he had been before now.
“A club in Shinjuku,” he answered though, honestly not remembering the name of the place as Mizuki had been in quite a hurry for some reason. As Ryo didn’t answer immediately, Hiroki looked away again and had some more of the hot drink. It was really nice to be inside, to be at home and drink something warm like this, but there was definitely something in the air that made everything really unpleasant. He wouldn’t push it though, usually it was better that way.
Looking away from Hiroki in annoyance, Ryo slid his hands into the front pockets of his jeans.
“You didn’t come home last night…,” he said, the tone of his voice reliving a bit of his anger. Unlike the older one had hoped as he had left his friends last night, there had been no one home when he had finally arrived, no relief of finding his husband home, no nothing. Just the image of Hiroki with that girl burned in his mind, flashing over his eyes every time he had tried to sleep – in the end he had fallen asleep on the couch, feeling angry and betrayed, sad, wondering where Hiroki was, with who he spent the night with?
The first thing Hiroki did then was to put down his cup. He was very well aware of that he hadn’t gotten back home, mainly because he hadn’t thought that Ryo would be there. Though now that he obviously hadn’t, maybe if he would have gotten back home then they would have had time for each other? But then again, wouldn’t Ryo have called him if he had wanted him around? That was what they usually did – or at least sent a mail or something. Hiroki hadn’t received any of that.
“Crashed at Mizuki’s,” he answered eventually as he turned a little in his seat and looked up at Ryo. Why did he sound so angry over something like that? It was true that Hiroki didn’t spend the whole night away from the apartment too often – he preferred sleeping in his own bed – but Ryo had absolutely no reason to be angry at him for staying somewhere else for a night when he did the same thing himself so often.
Hardly believing that Hiroki had stayed over at his friend’s place, Ryo let out a sigh as he took his phone from the counter, opened the mail that had the clip attached to it and then placed it on the table in front of the younger one.
He was sick of this game already, and if Hiroki wasn’t going to come out with it then he would just have to ask about it.
“What the fuck is that about?” Ryo then asked, calm still, though not as careful with his language as he had previously been. He didn’t know what to say though, or how to act, he really just had no idea what to think about that clip, the noises from it driving him crazy even though it was just people talking loudly over the music.
“Care to explain?”
Hiroki’s eyes widened as he stared down at the cell phone before him. He had had it in the back of his mind, a small reminder of that he had been a bit too drunk last night and been acting without thinking. But to think that it had been caught on video and that he had actually gone so far as to do something like that with a girl he didn’t even remember the name of…
As the clip was way too long for his liking, Hiroki closed the phone and then looked up at Ryo. He was going to explain, he had to explain – of course he had to. But what was he going to say?
“I…,” Hiroki started then, glancing down at the cell phone before he shook his head and grabbed his cup again. “I barely remember.”
His anger getting the better of him, Ryo reached out to slap Hiroki across his face, causing the younger one to loose his hold of the cup on the process, spilling what was left in it all over the table.
“Do you have any fucking idea how humiliating it was to get that in the middle of the night in front of everyone?!” the older one shouted, hovering over Hiroki. He couldn’t believe this, couldn’t believe Hiroki, it just didn’t make sense.
For a few seconds, Hiroki only looked at the coffee now all over the table and his cup now lying in the middle of all of it. He had deserved that, of course he had, but even so Hiroki couldn’t help but be really upset about the fact that Ryo had actually slapped him.
He then looked up at the older one and with that also leaned back as he didn’t want to be too close to him right now.
“I didn’t ask anyone to send that,” he answered coldly though, not quite sure of why he didn’t really apologize when he did in fact regret it. Of course he did, he loved Ryo and all so of course he didn’t really like the fact that he had been making out with that girl last night. But for some reason an apology just wouldn’t come over his lips.
Shocked as Hiroki showed no regret over it, Ryo let his right hand curl into a fist.
“Must’ve been a good fuck to get you so proud,” he said then mockingly, not for a second believing that Hiroki had actually slept over at Mizuki’s. It hurt; it hurt to know, to see.
“And that someone was Asuka, she must’ve gotten happy seeing that,” Ryo could only imagine the joy Asuka must have felt having gotten that on film. Turning away from Hiroki, Ryo took a few steps, kicking the kitchen counter on his way out of the room, he couldn’t stand being so close to Hiroki right now, disgusted with the way he acted.
Left was Hiroki, not quite sure of how he should react to any of that. Honestly he wanted to shout after Ryo that he hadn’t slept with her and he would tell the older one eventually but right now, all he could think of was Asuka. He hadn’t seen her at all and to be honest he didn’t even think she was the type to go out. That the two of them had ended up at the same night club in Tokyo was a miracle in itself.
Hiroki had never liked her though, not even a little bit. Of course he was thankful to her but he never really liked her. He had always thought it wasn’t obvious, but probably he had been wrong considering she obviously disliked him so much that she felt she had to send a video like that to Ryo. What did she want anyway? To destroy things between the two of them? Maybe she wanted to take the role as a mother for Miyuki all of a sudden? Maybe… maybe she wanted to end up living with Ryo who was Miyuki’s dad after all, at least on paper.
Suddenly really scared, Hiroki got up from his seat and then walked over to the doorway. He meant to leave immediately but first he looked back at the table and the mess that was there… he had to take care of that soon, but first he would take care of Ryo.
Soon finding his boyfriend in the living room, Hiroki had had every intention on not sounding angry or upset, but simply regretful as that was what he felt. He didn’t like to fight after all, but seeing Ryo stand there – seeing just how angry he was over something that didn’t happen, for some reason it upset him. How could he think he would do that anyway? Granted, would you ask Hiroki he would say he wouldn’t even make out with someone else, but to go so far as have sex with someone completely random?
“I told you I slept at Mizuki’s place,” he finally said though, his voice not showing any of what he felt but that little bit of annoyance. He was quite offended though, that Ryo would think that he would actually go ahead and sleep with just anyone. Did he really think of him as that cheap?
“Fuck off…,” the older one said then, looking down at the floor as he leaned both of his hands against the wall in front of him. He could sense the tears trying to make their way through, but determined to keep his cool with this; he wouldn’t cry over Hiroki being an asshole, Ryo bit his lip as he punched the wall once.
“Don’t you have any fucking shame?” No matter how much Ryo loved the younger one, right now he couldn’t help but to feel disgusted, disgusted with the way Hiroki had acted last night as well as the way he was acting right now, showing no regret as if he thought what he had done was completely okay.
“If you’re gonna be like that I’ll just leave,” the younger one said then, not thinking too much of what he was actually saying at this point. Of course he didn’t want to leave but if Ryo was going to be childish about it – act as if what he said was true and not listen to what Hiroki had to say at all – he honestly saw no point in staying.
“If I tell you I slept at Mizuki’s, that means I fucking slept at Mizuki’s. I don’t even remember that girl’s name.”
“That doesn’t make it any better…,” Ryo then said, turning around in order to face the younger one. Even if Hiroki hadn’t slept with her, he had still made out with her – and while it wasn’t nowhere near as bad as sleeping with someone, seeing that clip of them had really pissed him off, and not only that but everyone had seen that – the people he hang out with at work and on his free time had seen that, the people he told about his future plans, the only people he could brag about his family to… he just really felt humiliated.
“Everyone saw that Hiroki! Tomohisa, Jun, Yuu, all of the guys saw that fucking clip of you!”
“It’s not MY fault that bitch decided to send you that, is it!?” Hiroki immediately shouted back then, not even thinking that Asuka was worth mentioning by name anymore. It went without saying that she had gone from being someone Hiroki didn’t like, to being someone he just couldn’t stand. Probably he wouldn’t be able to just be in the same room as her in a good while now.
“’s not my fault you let everyone see the things on your cell phone either, or what did you do, huh? Pass it around or what?”
Not believing what he was hearing, Ryo walked up to the younger one, angrily pushing him backwards.
“Would you know how to behave she wouldn’t have had anything to film either!” he yelled, pushing Hiroki again, hard enough to have him hit the wall behind him. Later he would hate himself for landing a hand on Hiroki, later he would feel so guilty he wouldn’t know what he should do, but right now Ryo wasn’t quite aware of what he was doing.
“What the fuck is up with you!?”
There was nothing wrong with him, was it? This wasn’t Hiroki’s fault – it wasn’t his fault that Ryo went out so much and sure, while it was his fault that he had made out with that girl… it sure as hell wasn’t his fault he had felt the need to do it. Maybe if Ryo wouldn’t be such an asshole then yesterday wouldn’t even have happened.
Not liking how he was being pushed around, Hiroki soon pushed Ryo in return and walked away from the wall. Normally he didn’t really mind when Ryo pushed him against a wall or a door or whatever, but the circumstances were a bit different now.
“I’m leaving now,” he announced then, glaring at Ryo shortly before heading towards the hallway.
Glaring after Hiroki, Ryo shook his head as he followed him to the hallway, there was no way he would let Hiroki go like this.
“Just like that huh? You think that’ll fix this?” Ryo asked, getting angrier every passing second. Did Hiroki really think he could run from this? Why couldn’t he just face the problem and deal with it already?
“Go on then, runaway from this! Like I fucking care!” he yelled. Would the younger one leave though? Ryo would probably have to follow him or this would turn into an even bigger fight, one of those when they didn’t talk for days and he really didn’t want that, it had been a while since the last time and he’d like to keep it that way.
Stopping at that, Hiroki turned to glare at the older one.
“I’m not running away!” he yelled back, despite not really needing to use a loud voice when Ryo was in the same room. “But I can’t stand the way you’re acting right now so I’ll just leave.”
Honestly Hiroki just wanted to hit Ryo already because he was so… he was yelling too much. The way he was acting was just too much, too different and Hiroki just couldn’t take it. Of course, could he decide then they would just forget about all this already and make up but as Ryo was acting right now… it seemed rather impossible.
“You’re a fucking coward Hiroki,” Ryo then said, taking a step forward as he kept glaring at the younger one.
“You can’t take any blame over the things you do,” he went on, not thinking of what he said as the anger kept pushing the words out from his mouth.
“You screw up yet all you do is blame others! But everyone knows you aren’t as innocent as you look now, everyone fucking knows!” Actually now he just really wanted Hiroki to get the fuck out of his apartment, if this was how the younger one was going to be, then Ryo didn’t want to know what kind of a turn this fight would take if he’d stay here, he didn't want to know how far he would go, taking his anger out on Hiroki – tired and angry and sad, Ryo knew he wouldn’t last like this through the evening though, but breaking down in front of Hiroki wouldn’t happen.
Ryo didn’t get to say much more after that before Hiroki walked up to him and hit him straight in the face. Of course he would regret it later but right now all he could think of that there was no way Ryo would get away with saying things like that.
“Fucking asshole,” he muttered through gritted teeth as he looked at the older one, waiting for him to say something. Maybe take it back – because he still could.
Of course, the reason to why Hiroki had hit the older one just now was because there probably was some truth to what he had said. He didn’t like to believe so though and this he would rather make Ryo shut up than to actually talk or think of it.
Not wasting time, Ryo immediately returned the gesture, slapping Hiroki hard across the face.
“What the fuck makes you think you can hit me?!” the older one asked, obviously not realizing how he had no right to do it either, but it wasn’t like he would just stand here and take this, not when Hiroki was the one in wrong.
“Go to that fucking bitch of yours if it’s too for you much to deal with things!” he then shouted, pointing at the door. It wasn’t like he couldn’t take another night staying up and wondering where Hiroki was until the dawn. Leaving Hiroki alone in the hallway, Ryo walked into the kitchen, grabbing his phone from the table and angrily throwing it at the nearest wall.
Despite wanting to just hit Ryo again, Hiroki decided to ignore it and instead do as he was told. He would leave and he would take the car to go somewhere… somewhere that wasn’t here. Maybe he’d go back to Osaka and maybe he would stay there for a while…
Though as there was no way he would spend hours on a train, he had every intention on taking the car until he realized he had no idea of where the keys were. The last one to having used it had been Ryo after all…
After having thought of it for a while, Hiroki walked in to the kitchen and looked at Ryo’s back before he held out his open hand before him.
“The car keys,” he said, surprising himself by having a much thicker voice than he normally would have.
Turning around as he heard Hiroki talk, angry at the request, Ryo pushed the younger one hard enough to cause him to fall on the floor.
“You won’t get anything from me,” he then said, glaring down at Hiroki. Why couldn’t the younger one just fix this already? Why couldn’t he just deal with the blames and take his responsibilities? Ryo didn’t like fighting, but what had happened last night, and the way Hiroki acted right now, it was impossible to suffocate the growing anger inside him.
Looking up at his boyfriend then, meeting those eyes that looked way too angry, Hiroki couldn’t help but feel a bit scared. Turning so he was leaning back and supported himself against his arms, the younger one backed up a little and then smiled ironically. It wasn’t funny, of course it wasn’t, but even so he couldn’t help but…
“…you learned quite a lot from that role, huh.”
It was a rather mean thing to say perhaps, but right now Hiroki couldn’t help but feel a bit scared. He’d seen this on TV after all, the next thing would be a kick or something but surely Ryo wouldn’t go that far?