just sunshine and blue sky, this is all we get for living here;
Feeling drained in any manner, mental or physical, wasn’t a familiar sensation at all for Tobias, even after everything that had happened since he had returned to Xavier’s. Even after what had happened with Sabretooth, an encounter that had seen him wounded and restricted to the medlabs while the healers made the rounds, hadn’t really prepared him for the more recent events. Tobias had literally lost days of his life in a coma first natural and then medically-induced for his own wellbeing. It wasn’t even the loss of time that perturbed him exactly; he could understand exactly why they had done what they had, even if they hadn’t listened to his wife, leading to an incident that could have been avoided altogether, one that couldn’t have been easy on anyone involved. It was silly for Tobias to feel guilty about that when he hadn’t really done anything wrong. That didn’t change the fact that he had apologised to Jo after he’d been brought back to the school and healed enough to actually talk with her. Silly, really, but she knew him better than anyone, knew what he was like, and understood that he was the sort to apologise for most anything, even when he wasn’t at fault in any way.

Tobias had been spoiled by his ability. He knew that. It was a fact he had come to accept time and time again over the years, acknowledging it outright and openly if and when it came up. He didn’t get tired, he didn’t burn out, he could drink most people under the table and he could stay on top of not only his work but his other responsibilities and still have time to spare at the end of the day. He slept a small handful of hours in a week, and was almost obnoxiously active and energetic. Running on a near-constant adrenaline high had led him to forget what it was like to feel exhaustion of any degree. Since getting out of the hospital, he had been feeling it. They had given the wounded faculty members the week off to get themselves together, regain their composure and get ready for classes again. Tobias hadn’t really wanted it, but when forced to admit that his head hadn’t stopped aching -- throbbing was probably a better word for it -- since everything that had happened, he had admitted defeat and stayed back, let some kid he didn’t even know take over his classes, content to do so only because he knew Jo would be watching them like a hawk, only too ready -- not to mention willing -- to intervene if something went awry. The headaches had lessened, decreasing in increments as the days passed, and by the time the new week had rolled around, it was little more than a niggling drone in the back of his skull. Nothing to worry about. That was what he had said, how he had written it off, with a nonchalant wave of his hand and a shrug of his shoulders. If there was anything really wrong, the healers would have noticed and caught it. Just because he didn’t get headaches a lot, that didn’t mean they were anything to get worked up over.

It wasn’t even really those headaches. Over the last week, give or take, since he had been retrieved from the hospital and brought back to the school to have his injuries taken care of by the healers, he had been sleeping a lot. It would have been amusing if it hadn’t thrown him so completely out of whack. He would wake up on his bed to find that he had fallen asleep in the middle of the day, something he hadn’t done since before the manifestation of his abilities. ‘Naps’ had very much become a thing of the past for him, and full nights of sleep had more or less been weaned out of his routine altogether. Not so much recently. For a little over a week now, he had been submitting to the demands of his tired body and crawling into bed at the end of the day, only waking up the next morning when the alarm went off on the nightstand. It was… weird. Alien and unfamiliar. Tobias didn’t like it. Not one bit.

By the time he was finished with his renewed faculty responsibilities on Monday, he was frustrated with himself. His body was protesting, complaining with aches and pains that he couldn’t even bring himself to recognise in himself, and he was genuinely, physically tired. If anyone talked to him as he traversed the halls, he failed to hear them, too focused on other things to acknowledge the world around him. Down one corridor, past several doorway, around a few corners, and then he was reaching out and grabbing the handle for the back door to the mansion. It gave without a fight, and he stepped out, feeling the air hit his face and he kept on striding out until he was off the porch and in the middle of the back lawn. Taking in a deep breath to fill his lungs, feeling a ridiculous spark of panic that something with his powers might not be right, that somehow the severe damage done during the fight in the city had broken them somehow, he closed his eyes and let out the breath, waiting.

It wasn’t the brightest day in New York’s history, far from it, with clouds passing idly overhead, but there was still sunlight for him to use. Tobias didn’t think he could take another day of ‘taking breathers’ or ‘calling it a night’. That wasn’t who he was. He didn’t do those things. Not caring in the least who saw him or what they thought, he just stood there in the middle of the lawn at the rear of the mansion, eyes closed, determined to stay there until he’d taken all that he could. If he had to stand there for hours before his body felt charged again, then so be it.


[ narrative, closed ]