guiltyred (guiltyred) wrote in areyougame, @ 2009-07-30 16:03:00 |
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Title: Eulogy
Author: GuiltyRed
Rating: PG
Warnings: grief
Word count: 623
Prompt: Final Fantasy VII, Rufus and Dark Nation (gen, obviously, I hope): his only real friend - I used to call your name when no one else would come.
Summary: Rufus contemplates the greatest friendship of his life.
A/N: I don’t know which gender canon ascribes to DN, but to me, she’s a lady. Also, I’m going by the idea that, in the game, DN doesn’t have to die for Cloud to win that fight.
There was no way I would consign you to a kennel or a cage.
You were a little bigger than a loaf of bread, all paws and ears and great glowing eyes. You were a clumsy little thing – I still have the scar on my forearm from a wound I never told my father about.
I smuggled you into my bedroom, and laughed when your stubby legs refused to propel you up onto my bed. Then I lifted you there myself.
It never occurred to me that you might need a toilet in the middle of the night. Good thing you were better at jumping down than up, and damn good thing Nurse kept a supply of cleaning liquids in my bathroom.
Also damn good thing she didn’t know I could pick that cupboard’s lock, but then again, Turk training was as off-limits for me as keeping a wild animal in my bedroom, and we all know how that went.
It never crossed my mind to call someone else in to clean your mess, you know; keeping you hidden was worth the sacrifice, and I say that with full knowledge of how nasty your mess was. I would scrub out the carpet again, if only…
But you outgrew that awkward kitten stage so quickly, and rather than try to hide I proudly told my father that you were my guardian and so expected to remain at my side, day or night. Perhaps it was a sign of my future knack at difficult negotiations that he bought it. Maybe he just agreed that you were a superior bodyguard.
Or maybe he just didn’t want me inviting Turks to share my bed.
Silly man.
You occupied a place in my life that no lover could fill, for lovers are by necessity human and thus their motives are always suspect. A lover would look at me and see money, or power, or an enemy to be subjugated.
You were my friend. You kept me warm when all around me the world grew ever colder, when my father’s ambition led him to make new pacts with new devils, and I could easily imagine him selling even me to his research department.
He tried to sell you; I told him I’d have him killed.
We never spoke of it again.
Whenever I feel isolated or afraid, I remember black fur, dense as night, the best pillow I’ve ever known. I remember that rumbling huff that was your version of a purr, a sound, I was told, that your kind make for their cubs.
You defended me as if I were your cub, more than once, but it is the last time that changed everything.
All gone, so fast.
There was a flash of light, like a judgment from Heaven, and I knew I was going to die.
Then my back hit the floor as your weight drove me down.
I will never forget how you interposed your body between me and the exploding window, or how you went slack on top of me as the entire world went dark.
I miss you, my friend. At night, when the geostigma burns into my dreams, I long for the cushion of your furred side, and the gentle huffing promise that you would always keep me safe.
And if it is my fate to succumb to this disease, I pray that I might find your gentle spirit again in the Lifestream. Maybe there I will understand your language, and finally know just what stories you used to tell a frightened boy to lull him to sleep.