Weekend Getaway for Three, Final Fantasy VII (Genesis/Angeal/Sephiroth) Title: Weekend Getaway for Three Author/Artist:chichirinoda Rating: Rated E for Everyone Warnings: OMG NAKED GENESIS (er, there really aren't any warnings worth giving, honest) Word count: 4150 Prompt: Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core, Genesis/Angeal/Sephiroth: Dating Disaster - "If you would have just listened, we wouldn't BE lost Summary: Genesis, Angeal and Sephiroth take a fabulous vacation to Costa del Sol and get way more than bargained for. A/N: Nothing more to add.
The sun beat down on Sephiroth's half-nude body, warming skin usually protected by layers of leather and metal. Sand shifted underneath him and a slight pain made him reach underneath and pull out a sharp-edged shell. He pitched it away with a flick of his wrist.
It would have been peaceful, with nothing but the call of a few sea birds and the susurration of the ocean, but true quiet and serenity were rarely Sephiroth's lot.
"If you would have just listened to me, we wouldn't be lost in this godforsaken place!" Angeal snarled. He was still fully-dressed, and his boots slipped in the soft sand as he paced.
Genesis was under a palm tree - the only palm tree - shading his pale skin from the ravages of the sun. Few knew that he freckled like a Dalmatian, and in his state of undress he'd get freckles in some interesting places "Shut up," he said sullenly. "I think I hear helicopters. Why don't you go flag them down instead of bitching at me?"
Sephiroth sighed and turned over to bake his other side.
~ ~ ~
36 hours earlier
The stage lights were headache-inducing to the three SOLDIERs, but not nearly so much as the shrieking coming from the dimly-seen audience. Sephiroth was quickly discovering that women could manage quite a high pitch when excited, and there was nothing but wall-to-wall women in the massive theatre that had been rented for the event.
It was agony.
Not only that, but ShinRa had actually had to place a veritable wall of troopers between the seating and the stage, just to stop the three from being mobbed by the estrogen-crazed hoard.
"Do I hear ten thousand? ten thousand gil, I see eleven-- oh, twelve thousand gil for a weekend with-- Wait, did you say twenty? Twenty thousand gil! Don't forget, ladies, this is for charity," the announcer was saying.
"Charity, my ass," Genesis murmured, leaning close to Sephiroth. "The President wants to retrofit his airship with the latest gadget, mark my words."
"We both know that," Sephiroth muttered, trying not to move his lips too much. At least no one expected him to smile, so he didn't have to force that expression onto his lips through the pain.
"Did someone really just bid thirty-thousand gil for this charade?" Angeal, on Sephiroth's other side, asked a few moments later.
"It's got to be a phoney bid," Genesis said. "How could anyone afford that?"
"How could anyone want to pay so much for this?" Sephiroth put in, rolling his eyes.
Angeal and Genesis just looked at him.
"What?"
"You really did grow up in a lab," Genesis scoffed, leaning away again. "No clue about women at all."
"He's right," Angeal said, straightening up and glowering at the middle distance. Sephiroth wasn't sure if Angeal was trying to discourage further bidding or whether that was just his usual expression.
It was over a few minutes later, a whopping fifty-thousand gil put up for the charity. They were led off the stage into the comforting relative-gloom of backstage.
"Thank Hades that's over," Genesis sighed, his back crackling as he stretched. "When do we go back to the Tower and forget all this happened?"
"I thought we were supposed to do something, first," Sephiroth said slowly. "Isn't there supposed to be a dinner with the winners or something?" Lazard had been rather vague about that, and they hadn't been led on stage where they could hear what the announcer was saying until midway through the proceedings, but he knew how ShinRa generally operated.
He'd likely have to entertain some simpering girl with too much money for an hour or so. Irritating, but not too difficult.
"Someone said something about Costa del Sol," Angeal mused. "I imagine it's more promotional appearances."
"Well, I don't know about you two, but I could use a vacation," Genesis said. "Those screams will echo in my nightmares for months."
The other two SOLDIERs murmured their agreement to that.
The announcer - whom Sephiroth vaguely recognized as being one of the SOLDIER third-classes but whose name escaped him - bustled up. "O-okay, sirs, it's all arranged now. The bid was actually made by a group of three, which works out, huh?" He laughed, high and nervous.
Sephiroth turned to look at him curiously. "Hmm," he said noncommittally, not quite willing to admit that he had no clue what the boy was talking about. Genesis and Angeal seemed to agree with his strategy, and said nothing for their part.
"All...all right, so you'll be getting on a helicopter straight from here and taken to the ShinRa mansion in Costa del Sol," the boy continued. Angeal nodded knowingly at that. "And another helicopter will be sent to bring you all back to Midgar on Monday morning, so you can do whatever you like until then. O-obviously there's no obligation to, er, provide them with any particular service or anything, but they've sure-paid-a-lot-of money-for-a-weekend-with-you-so-it-would-be-polite-to-show-them-a-good-time. Um."
That last part came out all in a breathless rush, and Sephiroth blinked as he parsed it. "Excuse me?" he said, a feeling of foreboding hitting him with the force of a sledgehammer.
"What do you mean, 'show them a good time'?" Angeal asked, glowering.
"What do you mean 'service'?" Genesis demanded.
"Uh..."
Sephiroth grabbed the boy's shoulder before he could do something foolish - or possibly intelligent - like bolt. "Explain."
The boy couldn't run with Sephiroth's hand clamped around his bicep, but he shrank three inches under the combined glare of three SOLDIER first classes. "D-didn't they explain it to you before you agreed to do it?"
The threesome exchanged glances. Of course they hadn't. When ShinRa told their pet SOLDIERs to jump, they were trained from birth to ask 'how high'. You didn't ask if you worked for ShinRa. It wasn't exactly prudent.
The boy swallowed three times before he managed to make a sound. "W-well it's pretty simple," he said. "T-the auction was to buy a private weekend at the ShinRa Mansion in Costa del Sol, with the three of you. L-like a date."
Sephiroth loosened his grip as the three SOLDIERs exchanged a gobsmacked look, and when he looked around again the boy had disappeared. Well, that was probably wise. And it wasn't like he'd planned the charade himself. He was a victim as much as they were.
Well, maybe not as much.
"Do you...suppose Lazard authorized this?" Angeal asked. He'd gone pale, and Sephiroth wondered if his own skin tone matched. He certainly felt like he'd been kicked in the chest by a chocobo.
"He must have," Sephiroth said numbly.
Genesis drew in a breath and then let it out audibly. "Come on, you two," he said, sounding far more calm than Sephiroth felt. "What are you afraid of? It's just a few women - normal human women. All we have to do is go to Costa del Sol, maybe sit and look pretty on the beach for a while, pretend to listen to them over candlelit dinner, quote them a little Loveless to make them flutter, and then bundle them back to Midgar before they realize we don't really give a crap. They'll think every gil was worth it."
Angeal and Sephiroth considered that for a few moments. Genesis was right. What was he afraid of?
They were just humans. He didn't know what to do, but that probably wouldn't matter. He wasn't obligated to do anything in particular. He'd just follow their lead and everything would be fine.
"You're right," he said finally, giving a nod. "How bad can it be?"
Angeal sighed. "Right. How bad can it be?"
Later, Sephiroth realized that Angeal had, perhaps, meant it ironically.
~ ~ ~
"...and then I told him, 'You could never stack up to the great Silver General, and he's the only man for me, so get lost', and off he went. Can you imagine, my friend said I should lower my standards? She just doesn't understand what it means to be the President of your fan club, and the responsibilities I have to maintain my high standard and image for the good of the other fans." Finally the woman paused to take a breath and a bite of her salad.
"Mmhmm," Sephiroth said.
Though the woman who'd initially been introduced to him the evening before on the helicopter had been wearing a suit and a severe bun, a day in the sun on the beach, a change of clothes, and the better part of a bottle of wine seemed to have allowed her to let her hair down - both literally and figuratively. The creature who'd shown up for this entirely-too-intimate dinner had hair that curled fetchingly over her shoulders, tastefully-applied makeup, a touch too much perfume for Sephiroth's sensitive nose, and far more bosom showing than he'd suspected she possessed.
And her previous cold demeanour and poise seemed to have been left behind in her room along with her bra. She had grown increasingly loquacious with each glass of wine, and Sephiroth wished mere wine was enough to dull the senses of a SOLDIER.
She chewed, swallowed, and washed it down with another gulp of wine, and then was off again.
"You are such a good listener, Mr. Sephiroth," she cooed. "I knew you were brave, and handsome, but I never thought you would be so good at listening."
Sephiroth twitched. "Really, you can just call me Sephiroth. It's my given name. No one calls me 'Mr.'."
Her eyes lit up like her birthday had come early. "I will, Sephiroth. Thank you."
"SOLDIERs really don't use family names," he went on stupidly, just wanting to say something to forstall the coming torrent of words he knew was impending. She seemed like an intelligent woman, just far too nervous. Couldn't they have a conversation?
"Really?" she breathed. She scooted her chair around the table and laid a hand delicately on his forearm. "I had no idea. Tell me more about what it's like to be a SOLDIER. Please."
A voice echoed in his head: 'there's no obligation to, er, provide them with any particular service or anything...'
He slipped his arm out from under her hand.
The sun was well down now, and Sephiroth hadn't seen Genesis or Angeal in hours. It seemed that the three heads of their respective fanclubs had pooled their college trust funds to purchase this weekend 'date'. All six of them had spent the day together, but come suppertime they had all been separated for dinner with such deftness that the three SOLDIERs had to have been conspired against.
The woman's hand was back somehow and Sephiroth felt a suspicious softness of bosom against his bicep as she leaned close. "Sephiroth, I can't tell you how honoured I feel to get this chance to spent time with you, alone. Are you having a good time?"
Sephiroth coughed slightly and took a drink of his wine to cover it. From the gleam in her eye, he suspected she thought the growing flush on his cheeks was from the alcohol, but he'd had as much as her and didn't feel a thing.
"Of course, uh, Lailah," he said. Show her a good time. Show her a good time. "You're...a fascinating conversationalist."
She beamed. "I'm so glad you think so." He felt something odd and realized she had placed a hand on his back.
Under his coat.
Forget it. You've faced dozens of bloodthirsty Wutaians, and hoards of vicious monsters. You can handle one drunken woman with more arms than an octopus, he told himself sharply.
Her other hand was on his knee now. "W-would you like to hear some Loveless?" he blurted desperately.
"Actually," she whispered. "I think I'd like to try out that bed in the next room, if that's okay with you." And then her teeth closed on his earlobe.
He shot out of his chair like he was on springs, leaving the coat behind. She looked around in confusion for a moment, blinking until she spotted him on the other side of the room.
"Sephiroth--?"
"That sounds lovely," he said hastily. "Why don't I go change into something more comfortable, and I'll be with you in a moment. All these straps will take forever... It'll be a distraction in the heat of things."
"But I'd love to help you take--"
"Wait right there, I'll be right back," Sephiroth said - a bit too loudly - and escaped into the hallway.
Angeal was already there, leaning against the wall, his arms folded.
"I was wondering how long it would take you."
Sephiroth stared at him. "Where is your...girl?"
"Sleeping the righteous sleep granted by a full bottle of wine," Angeal said.
"That didn't work on mine!"
A door opened a short distance down the hall and Genesis shot into the hall as if he'd been fired from a cannon. He was wearing only his underwear, his hear was mussed and Sephiroth could swear he had a perfect pair of lips marked in lipstick on his cheek.
Genesis slammed the door shut and leaned on it. The door rattled like something was trying to get out.
"You've got to help me," he hissed, his eyes wild and near panic. "She's like a squid or something, and she's got a knife."
A little concerned, Sephiroth moved towards him. "A knife? Why would she have that?"
"What do you think happened to my clothes?"
The threesome exchanged glances. Angeal removed his sword and wedged it into the doorframe, allowing Genesis to let go. "I think this calls for the use of a bit of my honour for a good cause," Angeal muttered. The door rattled again, but held.
"Now what do we do?" Genesis asked. "We've still got another day in this hell."
Sephiroth knew exactly what he wanted to do, and as the two other SOLDIERs tended to look to him for leadership, he cleared his throat to get their attention now.
"Now, we run."
A few minutes later they were outside and trotting down the beach towards the town of Costa del Sol proper. The ocean lapped against the shore, and the pilings of the docks that jutted out into the water at intervals. Each mansion along the shoreline had their own personal dock, with a variety of watercraft.
Sephiroth's senses were piqued higher than the quiet night called for. Costa del Sol was supposed to be safe, but he had heard of attacks even here, of violent six-foot worms rolling out of the waves to attack tourists. He was very conscious of Genesis' near-nudity and the fact that he was also virtually naked from the waist up. And none of them were armed.
Angeal strode forward to walk at Sephiroth's side. "There's a troop transport in berth at the military dock," he said. "I'm sure if we go there they can take us to Junon discreetly. I think we shouldn't try to board the ferry in this state, and considering that we're essentially shirking our duty by leaving early."
"I never thought you'd say something like that without immediately arguing that we return to our 'duty'," Sephiroth said ironically.
"Some duties are without honour," Angeal said in a clipped tone.
Genesis made a scoffing sound. "Are you guys both insane?"
Sephiroth glanced back at the other man, striding along the beach in his underwear and wearing an expression that looked a bit...pouty.
"What do you mean, Genesis?" Sephiroth prompted, bracing himself.
"We can't go there!" Genesis exclaimed, gesturing dramatically in the direction of the military dock and the twinkling lights vaguely outlining the shape of the transport. "Look at us. This isn't just about how they'll convince the women not to complain about losing their chance to get the sex they paid for."
Sephiroth stopped and turned to face his friend, sensing Angeal doing the same. "What's it about, then?" Angeal asked, but Sephiroth was pretty sure he already knew.
"We'll be the laughingstock of ShinRa," Sephiroth muttered, reaching up to touch his own bare chest. "The story will definitely come out when they see us."
"That's right," Genesis said. "I'm not going there like this!"
Angeal folded his arms. "Well what do you suggest, then?" he challenged. "Are you planning to go back?"
"Hell no!" Genesis snapped. He turned his back on them both, bowing his head in thought.
"I suppose we could just find somewhere else to stay," Sephiroth said uncomfortably, but at the look Genesis shot him he acknowledged that the results of that would probably be just as dire. If they appeared at the door of an inn after the highly-publicised auction, half dressed and mussed, it would be national tabloid news by morning.
"No, we can't just run away with our tails between our legs and hide, and wait to be rescued," Genesis declared, closing his hand into a fist. "I know just what we should do. Follow me."
Sephiroth and Angeal exchanged doubtful glances, but as Sephiroth moved to follow Genesis, he heard Angeal fall in behind him.
The pier Genesis led them to was rough under Sephiroth's stockinged feet. Genesis led them out to the end of the dock, to a yacht that bumped quietly against the wooden pilings, and gestured grandly. "We're no cowards," he said. "We're heroes, and we'll rescue ourselves. This boat should do nicely."
"Genesis!" Angeal exclaimed. "We can't sail to Junon in someone's pleasure yacht."
"It's a power boat," Sephiroth felt compelled to put in. "Quite easy to operate."
Angeal stared at him. "You aren't seriously considering this madness, are you Sephiroth?"
Sephiroth shrugged sheepishly and Genesis directed a smug smile at Angeal. "You see? Now get on board. It'll be fine!"
Genesis gestured vaguely out to sea. "How hard can it be? We just go in that direction until we hit land. There's nothing between here and there, and it only takes a couple of hours by ferry. You worry too much, Angeal."
Sephiroth, for his part, thought Angeal had a point. On the other hand, he agreed with Genesis that they really didn't have much choice. He reached out and put a hand on Angeal's shoulder, and steered him gently but firmly towards the boat.
"It'll be all right," he said in a low tone. "Driving a boat like this can't be much different than driving a car."
Genesis was untying ropes with a kind of mania. "That's right! I know exactly what I'm doing. My father had a boat just like this."
Somehow none of this was making Sephiroth feel any more confident, but he dragged the reluctant Angeal on board with him. What could happen?
~ ~ ~
It was dark on the ocean. Really dark, but the yacht had running lights and the three SOLDIERs had excellent night sight. They cruised along at a healthy fifteen knots, bouncing over the occasional wave, and Sephiroth was starting to believe that this nightmare might end with an uneventful arrival in Junon.
That was, until Genesis started easing up on the throttle, frowning down at the controls.
Angeal was on the bow, sitting crosslegged and staring out at the night - ostensibly watching for large landmasses that might leap out of the darkness to attack them. Sephiroth moved forward to sit in the co-captain's chair and leaned close to Genesis, hoping the roar of the engine would be enough to cover their conversation. Angeal was pissed enough that he'd been dragged into this without having yet another thing to worry about added to the list.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Um." Genesis said unenlighteningly, resolutely not looking at him.
"Genesis..." Sephiroth's eyes roved over the controls and dials, most of them unfamiliar to him and their readouts meaningless.
And then he saw something he recognized.
"We're out of fuel?"
Angeal's head whipped around and he shouted over the wind. "What are you arguing about?"
"Nothing!" Genesis exclaimed, easing back a little more on the throttle. "Er, do you suppose they have paddles on board?"
"How should I know?" Sephiroth demanded. "Genesis, how could this happen? Didn't you check whether there was enough fuel?"
"It was almost full when we left Costa del Sol," Genesis protested. "I thought it'd be enough."
"Genesis, stop messing around!" Angeal was trying to get their attention. "There's something ahead, but I think it's just an island. You need to angle a bit north to get past it."
Genesis stood up and peered into the darkness, then turned the wheel a little to starboard, his expression turning grim.
"Not south! North! Turn the other way!" Angeal gestured frantically. "You're going straight towards the island."
Sephiroth closed his eyes and grabbed onto something as a horrific scraping sound reverberated through the ship and they stopped abruptly. Angeal cried out and caught himself on the railing as he was nearly pitched overboard.
Genesis killed the engine, and an ominous silence descended.
...for about half a second, before the stomp of Angeal's boots on fibreglass reached them. He jumped down off the bow into the passenger section and grabbed Genesis by the arm. "You ran into a reef or something! We're beached."
"Angeal," Sephiroth started, reaching for the irate swordsman. "It doesn't matter."
"It doesn't matter?" Angeal rounded on him next. Sephiroth had never seen him lose it like this before. "We're probably taking on water. We're going to sink in the middle of the ocean."
"It doesn't matter!" Genesis cried. "It doesn't matter! We have no fuel anyway! We're stuck, okay!?"
Angeal turned to stare at him for a moment, then sagged.
"Don't blame him," Sephiroth said quietly. "I'll go look for something to help get us to shore."
"This was his idea," Angeal snapped.
"Screw it," Genesis snarled, stomping away towards the stern. "I'm going to swim to shore."
Sephiroth sighed and opened the door that led down into the hold.
By the time the sun rose, he and Angeal were paddling to shore on a giant inflatable chocobo and Sephiroth had resolved to ignore them both and sunbathe.
Things really, actually couldn't get any worse, at least.
He listened to Genesis and Angeal bicker as the sun rose and bathed the tiny desert island with its glow. The boat sat a dozen feet off shore, half-out of the water and grounded on a jagged bit of rock. The yellow inflatable chocobo bobbed and danced on the shore, tethered to the single palm tree with a bit of rope scavenged from the yacht.
Then a shadow covered the sun and Angeal suddenly stopped ranting. Sephiroth turned onto his back and looked up to see the underbelly of a black helicopter descending towards them.
He scrambled to his feet and retreated under the tree with Genesis as the helicopter kicked up sand and landed on the spot where he'd been lying. Angeal joined them, glowering.
"Thank goodness," Sephiroth said. "We're saved."
"Joy," Genesis muttered. "And now the humiliation really begins."
"How did they find us?" Angeal mused.
The helicopter doors opened and Tseng stepped out onto the sand. The Wutaian man looked like he was desperately trying not to laugh. "Well, well--"
The three SOLDIERs exchanged glances and then strode as one towards the Turk.
"Say one more word," Genesis hissed at the Turk as they walked past him and boarded the helicopter. "And I'll kill you, personally."
"I'll help," Sephiroth added.
"And I'll display your entrails in the lobby as an example to others," Angeal finished.
"I'm glad you enjoyed your vacation, sirs," Tseng said with a smirk. "I hope it was a sufficient...diversion from your normal duties. Your clothes and weapons are in the back."
The three SOLDIERs glanced at one another and Sephiroth saw his own smile echoed on the faces of the other two.
"We did, at that," Sephiroth admitted. Genesis laughed and nodded.
"So we did." Angeal clapped a hand on Tseng's shoulder hard enough to stagger the Turk, and they all headed to the rear of the helicopter to find clothes not saturated with salt water.
"But next time," Genesis declared as he wriggled out of his damp underwear. "You aren't allowed to be so mean to me, Angeal. You said some rather uncomplimentary things back there."
"No promises," Angeal replied.
Sephiroth just shook his head and started shedding salt-ruined leather. They all knew that the game wouldn't have been nearly as fun without Genesis, but Angeal just wasn't satisfied if he wasn't complaining about something, and somehow, Sephiroth wasn't happy without being caught between. They just weren't complete without each other.