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Bellatrix Rose Black-Lestrange ([info]afm_bella) wrote in [info]aftermidnight,
@ 2008-12-20 03:00:00

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Who: Bella and Rod.
What: Bella's getting worse and the hallucinations are starting.
Where: Her private room in Mungo's.
When: Late morning December 20th.
Rating: Uh.....
Status: Closed/Complete.





Bella lay curled up on her side, her arms wrapped tightly around her knees as she tried to keep her teeth from chattering out of her head. She no longer had the energy to complain that she was sick, or that she didn't feel well. Nor did she have it in her any longer to glare at the various people who bustled in and out of her room, checking on her and constantly asking inane questions about how she was feeling. The sweat shining on her forehead and the chills that raced through her body should have been enough to answer that question. And if it didn't the pale ashen gray tone her skin had taken on and the fact that she hadn't eaten in two days as she could keep nothing down was a big clue that she wasn't feeling well. Yet they still insisted on asking her every time they popped in. Or most of them did. Her sister had been by several times to see her as well as give her medication. There was a no potions note in her file, granted Bella had never given and explanation behind it it was still there so her sister had been giving her Muggle drugs, to no avail. None of them had made her feel any better and in fact several had only made her feel worse. But Andromeda had not asked inane questions about her health or poked and prodded on her. She simply injected the fluid into Bella's IV gave her a tired smile and headed back out of the room.

Today had been the same as all of the others as she drew the covers up tighter around her, though it didn't help. There was one change though, and one she wasn't sure what to make of it. Bella had been staring at the chair on the right side of her bed for an hour now, unblinking as she tried to figure out what to say. The man sitting there said nothing to her, only smiled softly at her and would occasionally reach out of her but at the last second would pull his hand back. It frustrated Bella to no end that he didn't touch her. Feeling was something she craved highly at the moment. Unwrapping an arm from around her knees, it slipped out from under the blankets and reached for him, a single word accompanying her gesture.

"Papa..."


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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-20 04:13 am UTC (link)
Rodolphus stepped into the room quietly, a frown tugging down the corners of his lips. He'd just brought Narcissa in, unconscious though coming 'round, after she'd collapsed in front of him at Malfoy Manor.
First Bella had fallen ill with it, and now her sister. God knows he couldn't tell Bella, not with protective she was of her youngest sister, and how ill Bella was at the moment. So he'd just have to bide his time and hope Bella wouldn't be angry later because he didn't tell her about Cissa.
It was for the best.

A moment or two after entering her room, Rodolphus looked up at her and at the chair to see who she was reaching for when the word 'papa' floated past his ears.

What?

He stood off to the side for a moment, glancing back at the chair again, only because she seemed so focused, before he took a step forward and spoke softly to her. "Bella? You--awake?"

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-20 04:24 am UTC (link)
A low sound a cross between a whine and a groan sounded low in her throat as her father simply stared at her hand before shaking his head sadly, neither of his moving from his lap. Why was he doing this to her? Did he not know how much she missed him? How much she needed him and yet he refusing to reach out to her, to take her hand or touch her and it only made her curl in further on herself.

"Please....." Her fingers spread as she reached for him again, silently urging him to take her hand and once again all he did was smile sadly at her and shake his head no.

"Why?" Bella didn't understand. Did he not love her? Had she done something to make him disappointed in her? Or was it something she didn't even know.

It wasn't until Rodolphus spoke that whatever concentration she had held broke and her gaze flickered from the chair towards him, a frown crossing her face.

"Rodolphus?" She blinked a couple of times before her gaze moved back to the chair, only to find it empty. "What's happening to me?" The words came out at a whisper as her hands came up to cradle her head, her eyes squeezing shut tight as she tried to make sense of all of this.

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-20 04:50 am UTC (link)
"I think you might have been dreaming," he said, not wanting to even consider hallucinations at this point. She was ill, and on a lot of medications he, and likely she, weren't familiar with, it was only logical, or he hoped, that it was something in one of those causing her to have lucid dreams.
Or whatever that was called.

He knew from what she was saying that she was seeing her father, and whatever he had said or done in her mind had made her sad, but he wasn't sure what he should do. Or what he could even say to fix it, save telling her it was a dream and hope that she believed him.

He moved to take a seat, not the one she had seen Cygnus in, but the one directly to the right of it, and dragged that chair closer to the bed.

"You're still not feeling any better, love?" he asked, reaching for her hand.

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-20 05:03 am UTC (link)
"Make it stop. I don't want to see any more. I want to see him anymore, not if he refuses to speak to me and for things I don't even understand." None of this was making any sense to her. Something in the back of her mind was whispering to her, telling her that there was no possible way her father could have been there but Bella had seen him and with just a few more inches on her reach she would have been able to touch him. But it seemed to her like he hadn't wanted that and Bella didn't understand why.

Opening her eyes slowly, dull, lifeless brown orbs focused on her husband, the edges blurring slightly as she stared at him, wondering if he were going to be a figement of her imagination as well. She hoped not. Bella hurt and in more ways than one. Her head was pounding, her body felt much like it had the first couple of days out of Azkaban and her throat was raw and sore from having been sick so much. What hurt the most though, was the silence in her head. The voices and the darkness had gone silent and more so than usual a little while ago and it made Bella highly uncomfortable.

Bella watched the hand that was extended towards her, waiting for the moment when it would fall back down into his lap, just a few inches short of touching her. It didn't though and slowly she reached out and grasped his hand as tight as she could, trying to make sure that he wouldn't leave her as well.

"What is wrong with me? Something's not right. I feel off. And I don't mean just because of the illness. But its more than that and I don't like it."

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 06:36 pm UTC (link)
None of what she was saying was making any real sense to Rodolphus, but she was ill--and he didn't know if he should humour her or--what. So he just kept silent.

When she took his hand, holding it tightly, he squeezed hers in return to let her know he wasn't going anywhere before loosening his hold and repositioning their hands, twining their fingers together.

"I wish I knew pet," he said, stroking over the back of her hand with his thumb and looking to her questioningly. "How do you feel off?"

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 06:55 pm UTC (link)
All she wanted was for it all to stop. She hated being this weak, this open and this unprotected. Even in a private room in a private wing of Mungo's with guards posted outside her door at all hours of the day she still felt vulenerable and open to attack and it wasn't going over well.

Bella wished the images would go away. She didn't want to see the impossible and the untrue any longer. It was only making her head hurt worse and making her feel worse and she didn't need that at the moment. Not with whatever illness this was racing through her and destroying whatever it had latched onto. She knew it was destroying something but she didn't know what. Only that whatever it was was starting to hurt.

"Its quiet. In my head. Its all gone quiet. I feel nothing or sense anything any more. It hasn't been like this since before Azkaban. And it bothers me. Nothing is lurking beneath the surface or in the back of mind. It all just stopped last night. Like it had been destroyed or kill and it hurts. I've gotten so used to it all that now that its gone, it hurts." The silence in her head was deafening and painful. With as much as she had wished for it all to go away and for it to be just her in her head, now that it had happened it bothered her. She almost wished she could have it back. Maybe then she wouldn't feel so bad.

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 07:50 pm UTC (link)
Times like these, Rodolphus wished he knew more about healing, and sickness in general just so he could reassure his wife. But all her words did was worry him, even more than, if that was possible, the way she looked and had been behaving when he walked through the door.

"You're on a lot of medications, Bella," he said. "I'm sure that's got to be a side effect of one of them. Once you're well enough to be taken off of them, I'm certain everything will return to normal."

He had no idea what he was saying, had no idea what the silence in her mind could signify, but he could be right about that, so it wasn't exactly a lie, was it?

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 08:07 pm UTC (link)
Bella just sighed as she stared at him, the fatigue showing plainly on her first. She had been sick before and yeah it dragged her down but this was different. This was a complete sucking and draining of her energy to the point where even keeping her eyes open felt like a chore she just refused to do. All she really wanted to do was curl with her husband in their bed at home and wait for this to pass. Bella was afraid though to let Rodolphus get any closer to her in case he got sick as well.

"I don't know. I don't even know half of the crap Andromeda has me on. Some of it makes me incredibly tired, others have made me sick, this last batch she just injected is making my head feel funny. And more so than it was to begin with.

"I honestly don't know what to expect anymore. I do know one thing though," she paused as she squeezed his hand tighter and pulled it closer. "I want to go home."

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 08:21 pm UTC (link)
"I'm sure whatever it is is going to help in the long run, love, it's likely fighting the infection or the illness off and that's what's making you feel that way."

He frowned at her next words, wishing for nothing more than to be able to take her home and get her better there. She hated hospitals, he knew that, but with the way she was looking and the way she was feeling, he couldn't take her from there. Especially without knowing exactly what it was she had, what they all seemed to be getting.

"I know, Bella," he said, leaning forward a bit and returning the squeeze to his hand. "It'll be over soon and we'll go home. Maybe back to Greece for a while if you want."

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 08:27 pm UTC (link)
Bella knew that the next words out of her mouth were going to be incredibly stupid and possibly dangerous but at this point she didn't care. She was tired, she was sick, and she hurt. All she wanted to do was curl up with the one thing that always made her better.

Gathering what strength she could she moved over the bed a bit and then glanced back up at him.

"Lay with me? Please?" Bella hated whining and she hated begging but with the way she felt she was on the verge of doing so if it would mean that she would get what she wanted. Maybe if she just lay with him for a while she would relax enough to sleep. There was no guarantee but it was enough to make her risk it if it would help.

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 08:43 pm UTC (link)
He looked at her, thinking for a moment if what she asked would be a good idea, not for him of course, but for her--but she had already moved before he could voice his doubts. What could it hurt?

"Of course," he said, rising from his chair and moving a bit hesitantly towards her, slowly lowering himself to the bed and lightly draping his arm around her shoulders. He didn't want to move her too much because he had no idea where or how she was hurting, not really, and he didn't want to cause her any more pain than necessary. "This alright love?"

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 08:50 pm UTC (link)
Bella just stared at him for a moment, blinking several times before moving closer. It took most of the energy she had but it didn't really matter to her. Sighing softly her head finally settled on his chest, her arms pinned between them as she just lay there quietly.

It bother her that he touched her as it didn't hurt. No what hurt he could touch and to be honest his touch felt good. She had been burning up all day in between the rounds of chills and currently his hand felt like ice cubes on her. It raised goosebumps all up and down her arms but she wasn't going to complain. At least not yet. In a few minutes or hours or however long it took for her body to change its mind and decide it was cold again she probably would but for now she was content with how things.

"Better now," she muttered softly, her gaze focusing on the wall as she let her thoughts drift.

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 08:56 pm UTC (link)
When she settled against him, he wrapped his arms around her gently tucking her as close as he could and pulling her blankets up around her to keep her warm.

"Try to rest, Bella," he said softly, reaching up to smooth her hair back from her face. He hoped him being there with her like this would make her feel better, at least a bit. It always worked for him when she was there.

He hoped this would pass soon. Really, really soon.

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 09:01 pm UTC (link)
"I hate this," she murmured softly, her ear pressed firmly against his chest. Bella had no idea why the sound of his heart was soothing for her as it was but it was and seemed to help. The longer she lay there the more relaxed she became. Hopefully it would last a while. This was the best she had felt since coming into Mungo's and while she still felt like shit it was better than it had been.

"When this is over, we're moving to Greece. Fuck the world. I no longer care." A small smile graced her lips when she felt his hands in her hair and her eyes fluttered closed. The only thing that would make this better was if they were at home. She would make do though with what she had at the moment.

"Love you.."

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 09:07 pm UTC (link)
He hated it too. Being helpless where she was concerned was just something that did not sit well with him. And that was a vast understatement.

"I'm all for moving to Greece," he said, nodding as he turned his face to drop a kiss to her hair, nuzzling her softly with his lips. He knew she wanted to go home, and he really wanted to do that for her. Soon though. Very soon.

"Love you."

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[info]afm_bella
2008-12-21 09:12 pm UTC (link)
"If I miss Christmas, someone is going to get a very angry letter from me." Her words came out a bit slurred as the drugs that Andromeda had given her finally kicked in. A pleasant warm feeling spread throughout her and she couldn't tell if it was because of the drugs that were pumping through her system or if it was because of the position she was in. Whatever it was she hoped it lasted. If she could spend the entire time while she was sick like this, she would be great.

"Don't leave?" She asked softly, her eyes fluttering closed and staying that way as her breathing evened out and slowed, sleep finally managing to claim her.

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[info]afm_rodolphus
2008-12-21 09:18 pm UTC (link)
He gave a soft chuckle to her words, crossing his legs at his ankles and shifting only slightly as he settled beneath her.

"You won't miss Christmas," he promised. "If need be I'll bring everyone here to spend the day with us. I'm sure none of them would mind."

Rodolphus glanced down at her when she spoke again, looking at her for a moment before realizing that she was asleep. She looked so peaceful right then, and he was more than relieved that she was finally getting at least a bit of that.

"I'm not," he whispered, even though he doubted she heard him. "I'll be right here."

Settling back just a bit more, Rodolphus stared at the wall across from them, worry now showing clearly on his face as he lost himself to his thoughts.

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