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Tweak says, "Yes, Prince Jake."

healerfawcett (healerfawcett) wrote in afreshrpg,
@ 2012-04-29 23:59:00

Entry tags:

retired: andromeda tonks, retired: sarah fawcett, time: 1998-04

WHO: Sarah Fawcett, Andromeda Tonks
WHEN: Monday, April 30, 1998
WHERE: Andromeda's office in St. Mungo's.
WHAT: Sarah follows up on her owl, and asks Healer Tonks for a bit of professional advice.
RATING: G
STATUS: Closed, in-progress.

Sarah finished marking the chart for the final patient of her morning shift, slotting the clipboard neatly back into its holder on the door of the elderly wizard's room. She sighed and rolled her shoulders, dislodging the tension that had been mounting since she came in for the start of her shift at dawn. Glancing at her watch, she decided that she would head up a couple of floors and try to catch Healer Tonks in her office before going in search of lunch and a strong cup of coffee.

Sarah hadn't expected to hear back from the older witch so promptly, but she was pleased that she had, and she was thrilled that Healer Tonks was so willing to talk with her. Sarah admired Healer Tonks tremendously, and if she were being honest with herself, she was a little nervous about making a good impression. She strode quickly through the hallways, heading for the nearest bank of lifts, giving herself a pep talk the entire way. Still nervous when she got out on the floor where Healer Tonks' office was located, Sarah swallowed hard, trying to quell the butterflies in her stomach.

She arrived outside Healer Tonks' door and, taking a deep breath, knocked lightly before she could talk herself out of it. Hopefully, she wouldn't be disturbing the other witch. She waited for a beat before speaking. "Healer Tonks? Are you there? It's Sarah Fawcett. D'you have a few minutes?"

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_andromeda
2012-05-06 06:16 pm UTC (link)

For nearly a month, Andromeda had felt exhausted. It wasn't that she was over-exerting herself, but the emotional stress of what had happened with her cousin. Regulus was a dear soul to her, and to see him in such a state really shook her heart.

Not to mention, having Mary acting as if she owned the hospital was somewhat infuriating. Andromeda didn't consider herself a bitter person, but she could be a trite cold when scorned.

She was looking forward to her meeting with Sarah, if only to find something new to occupy her mind with. Sarah was a dear, and very much an asset to St. Mungo's. When the knock came at the door, Andromeda wasn't surprised, but relieved. She'd had far too much time alone, at late.

"Come in!" she called pleasantly, picking up a stack of papers and moving them aside so as her desk would be less cluttered.

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healerfawcett
2012-05-07 04:32 am UTC (link)

When she heard Healer Tonks respond, Sarah opened the door and poked her head inside before stepping fully into the office. "Thank you for agreeing to see me," she murmured as she entered and closed the door behind her. "I appreciate it more than you know."

She smiled at the older witch, sitting down in the chair across from her desk and folding her hands in her lap. "I'm afraid I've been driving myself a bit mad trying to make this decision, and I could really use some objective advice."

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_andromeda
2012-05-07 03:15 pm UTC (link)

"Don't give it half a thought," Andromeda said with a smile, folding her hands neatly on her desk. She watched as Sarah entered the room and had a seat, vaguely remembering the anxiety she felt at the same crossroads that the younger witch was now experiencing.

"I understand," she sat back in her chair, letting her hands fall into her lap now. "Why don't you tell me what's been running through your head?"

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healerfawcett
2012-05-08 05:30 am UTC (link)

"Well," Sarah took a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling at ease in Healer Tonks' presence. "I suppose the first problem is that I thought I was so set on Potions & Plant Poisonings, because I've always done well with Potions...but I'm starting to feel like that's a 'safe' choice."

She fiddled absently with the cuff of her trainee's robes as she spoke, looking up at Healer Tonks as she continued. "And so I've been considering Spell Damage because it just fascinates me. For awhile I've been going back and forth between those two...but..." she trailed off, feeling a bit silly. "I had a bad experience during my rotation on the Emergency Floo awhile back."

Sarah looked down at her hands, embarrassed to admit to having nearly gone to pieces when treating George. "It's made me doubt myself a bit."

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_andromeda
2012-05-10 04:43 pm UTC (link)

Andromeda smiled softly, "Sarah, if one bad experience shakes you up, you simply haven't had enough of them yet," she was at ease, and there were no tones in her voice that would have any sort of negative connotation about the statement.

"The truth is, this is in the medical field there will be a lot of bad experiences. Patients come and go, and unfortunately we cannot fix everything."

She reached to her right, opening the drawer just below the desktop, where she kept a small dish full of lemondrops. She pulled it out and took a few before offering them to Sarah. She always found herself to be more at ease when her hands had something to fuss with, and she wondered if Sarah felt the same. "Would you like to talk about what happened with the Emergency Floo? Perhaps we can sort through it and find a way to put your mind at ease."

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healerfawcett
2012-05-15 01:11 am UTC (link)

Sarah bit her lip in hesitation. She wasn't sure whether Healer Tonks' pronouncement made her feel better about what had happened, or worse about what was surely ahead of her in this profession. Still, she was no quitter, so she would have to find some way to get used to it.

She took a pair of lemondrops gratefully when Healer Tonks offered them, popping them in her mouth and savoring the tartness for a moment before responding. She was a bit afraid that this story would make her look bad. "Well, it was a fairly simple injury, actually," she began softly, "the patient had severe lacerations, several broken bones in his arm, and was losing a fair amount of blood, but it wasn't anything terribly out of the ordinary."

Sarah sat back in her chair and looked at Healer Tonks as she continued, "but I nearly panicked too badly to treat him because...he was someone I knew, and my personal feelings were too strong for me to push aside. At first." She waited, hoping that she wasn't about to get an earful about unprofessional conduct.

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_andromeda
2012-05-15 05:42 am UTC (link)

Andromeda nodded throughout the story. She understood completely, and it was a part of the emotional process of becoming a healer. Sure, there was training for all things magic, but to be a healer truly took a certain state of mind.

"Even in Muggle medicine, it is ill-advised to treat someone that you are emotionally attached to," she explained. "Our attachments can sometimes blind our judgement. And yet, we will occasionally find ourselves in such predicaments, and it can be more than difficult to make the call to step away."

Parable aside, she nodded for the girl to continue.

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healerfawcett
2012-05-26 01:56 am UTC (link)

Sarah nodded, glad that Healer Tonks hadn't reprimanded her outright. Still, she understood the point of the older witch's story, and was glad of the advice, if a bit perplexed as to how to carry it out. "But...how? How do you do that - achieve that detachment? I forced myself to focus on the details of his treatment and not on him, but it was incredibly hard. Does it ever get easier?"

She sucked on the lemondrops, their tartness causing her to purse her lips. "Maybe I'm just not cut out for Spell Damage. It might be better off for me - and the patients - if I just stick to Potions. Maybe I'm destined to be a lab rat, so to speak." She offered Healer Tonks a tight smile, only realizing now as she spoke the words how bitter they sounded.

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_andromeda
2012-05-29 07:52 pm UTC (link)

"You have to find a balance," Andromeda explained. "Sometimes, when treating someone you care about, it is best to step back and let someone else handle it, so that you can be there for that person in other ways. Otherwise, it does get easier with time, to see the medicine and detach yourself from the emotions of it."

She smiled gently. "Do you think you would be happier in Potions than you would in Spell Damage?"

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healerfawcett
2012-05-30 04:10 am UTC (link)

Sarah nodded again. "That makes sense. I just don't feel I have that balance yet." She chuckled ruefully, "I suppose I can't push it...but it's so frustrating waiting to develop it."

She smiled sheepishly at Healer Tonks. "I guess I'm a bit impatient. I just...I just don't want to fall short." She couldn't quite bring herself to actually use the word fail.

After carefully considering Healer Tonks' question, Sarah at long last shook her head. "No," she said slowly, "I don't think so. I love Potions, always have, and they've always come fairly easily to me," she blushed a little bit at that. "I think it would feel like I wasn't pushing myself enough. Like I was hiding."

Huh. She hadn't known she'd felt that way before she walked into the room. It seemed that this talk was quite illuminating, indeed.

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_andromeda
2012-06-01 06:03 pm UTC (link)

"It will come with time," Andromeda promised. "Nothing comes quickly or naturally in Healing."

Sarah certainly had the talent and the passion it took to be a Healer, the only thing that seemed to get in her way was, well, Sarah herself.

"If that is the case," she sat back in her chair, considering Sarah's words carefully. "I think you should go with Spell Damage. If it doesn't work out, there is always Potions later. But if you don't give Spell Damage a try, I think you will regret it later on down the line. I don't want you to feel you've sold yourself short."

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healerfawcett
2012-06-06 05:13 am UTC (link)

Sarah took a deep breath and held it for a moment, before exhaling slowly. She looked at Healer Tonks and nodded just as slowly. "I think...I think you're right. I think I would be kicking myself in the near future - forget about down the line - if I didn't at least try." She smiled at the other Healer.

She caught sight of the clock on the office wall, and noticed with alarm that she only had about twenty minutes before she needed to start her afternoon shift. She was feeling much more energized than she had been when she entered the office, but a cup of coffee and some food were definitely in order before she took on an afternoon full of patients. She rose, speaking quickly but sincerely. "I can't thank you enough for your advice. Talking with you has really clarified a few things for me."

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	_andromeda 2012-06-10 02:55 am UTC (link)
	"I think you ought to try, then," Andromeda agreed. The only thing holding Sarah back was Sarah herself, and Andromeda knew that the younger witch was fully capable of rising above those feelings of doubt in order to become a great Healer. "It was my pleasure," she stood as well to offer her hand to Sarah. "Any time you'd like to talk, feel free to drop by." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

healerfawcett
2012-06-11 05:49 am UTC (link)

"Thank you again, Healer Tonks," Sarah said warmly as she stepped towards the door. "I really appreciate the help. Sometimes I overthink things."

She opened the door and moved into the hallway, turning back and poking her head into Healer Tonks' office. "Have a great afternoon, she said brightly to the older witch before popping back out and striding down the hall filled with great purpose and excitement for the future.

But first, lunch.

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